Disconnected

Sometimes I feel so disconnected with the people around me. I don't feel the joy and I don't see the beauty. I know God's beautiful creations are everywhere and if I even put in an iota of effort, I will see it. But alas, I don't feel like it.

I turned 39 not too long ago and as always I wanted a quiet dinner with the kids and husband. There were a few unexpected guests who came over, with very good intentions of celebrating with us but I wasn't feeling too sociable. While they sat and had cake and chit chat, I was spacing out for most part of the time.

I feel like I am losing my mojo. Not sure what I need to do to reconnect but you know, I am also afraid that I am liking being distant a little too much. I feel like I need my space but I'm not sure what I'd do with all that space? Is this mid life crisis? Too many questions with no answers. Maybe it's time for more self-reflection...

And yes, I am exaggerating

But not by that much, really.

The trip to the Indonesian embassy was made memorable as I was interviewed by two different officers on how and why the passport went missing. Like, hello? I don't want to get all defensive but the key words were "moved house" and "passport missing" and I have only repeated it all afternoon. I told them we discovered the passport was missing a week before we made the police report as we wanted to make sure we went through all of the boxes. Only to be told that I should've waited for a month before declaring the passport lost. If looks could kill, I would've been held for murder.

The second interview was with another officer who wanted to know how much I paid my helper and how often she gets her day off. Which were harmless questions but I wasn't in a sociable mood anymore, after five hours of mostly waiting, at the embassy. And then of course, I read a story like this which makes me angry because again, employers of domestic helpers need all the bad rep they can get, right?

Preparing Sara for her math exam is taking its toll on me. I have had two bouts of migraine and I think I have finally suitably confused her with my explanations and terrified of me getting all upset when she still doesn't get the concept I was trying to desperately explain to her. I am just thankful that she doesn't need much help with her languages and that we only need to focus on Maths. I am trying very hard to keep my eyes on the ball here.

And Farah has completed her exams but is throwing herself (far too much, I think) in her school drama club. I got really upset when she came home way after dinner and didn't even bother to call to let me know. I hit the roof and gave her a piece of my mind, resulting in much pouting and sulking (her, not me).

The husband will be back tomorrow and it can't come sooner because I am about ready to collapse. And that, is no exaggeration.

Coming up for air...

What a ride. The endless visitors, the missing passport, the clearing of remaining boxes as part of the passport search exercise, and work, work, work plus exams, exams, exams. I haven't had time for kick-boxing and yoga. Grrrr.

In the meantime, enjoy this video:

Knee-deep...

...with work. And many visitors at home. No. Time. To. Rest. Helper. Lost. Passport. Horror story about my encounter at the embassy to come soon...

Outrageous!

For those living in Singapore, did you know that your phone number and address could be listed on yellowpages.com.sg?

If you didn't know, welcome to the club. A friend told me about the website and I was flabbergasted when I found out that my new address and phone numbers were listed there without me providing any authorisation.

I called my service provider up and demanded that they got my numbers removed. Here's the cherry on the cake - I could get my number and address removed as long as I pay $2.14 per month to get my details unlisted.

So, let me get this straight. My service provider gave out my details to yellow pages without informing me, let alone getting authorisation from me, and if I wanted to be removed from yellow pages, I need to pay the service provider monthly payments so that my details which I didn't authorise for them to divulge to third parties, could be removed. Someone please explain the logic to me? Because I think, if anyone gets to profit from this, it should be me. They should be paying me $2.14 per month to have my details on their website.

For now, I told them to unlist my number and I have told them I want to know who's getting the $2.14 per month and why should consumers be paying for something like this. The poor customer service person who got my tirade was obviously tired of my rant by then, and promised he would get his supervisor to call me back. It's been 24 hours and no call. But fret not, I will be calling them soon.

I am annoyed. And if you find your details on yellowpages.com.sg as well, you should be too.

Knackered

We moved in just in time for Eid, alhamdulillah.

And while we have unpacked some boxes, many more remained untouched. Most were hidden in the store room and others are in the bedrooms. The main idea was to keep them out of sight of guests who came fast and furious. I was telling the husband I don't recall having to host this many number of guests in recent years so I think the attraction was for people to come by to see our new home and Eid was a nice segue to that. I think.

We didn't have a big Eid cook out because like, who's got the energy and time when all we did was unpack, vacuum, mop, wipe, repeat. Family members took pity on us and cooked for us. And in the end, we had more food than we would have if we cooked. One of life's ironies.

So in between unpacking (still!) and visiting the must-visit-relatives and hosting many guests, it is safe to assume that I am glad I am back at work. The respite won't be for too long though as we are expecting more people this weekend and the kids are bringing some friends over.

I'm too tired to even think about what we need to do to prepare for these guests this weekend. Would serving them pizza be considered bad manners...? I could ask for rendang topping to make it a bit more Eid-ish...hmmm there's a thought...

No faaaaiiiirr!

I lost a few days at the start of Ramadhan and now I'm going to lose a few more at the tail end! In the end, I'm going to owe nine days in total...aargh :(