Sweet and sad September

When September comes around, I get a bit neurotic. It's a yo-yo ride between happiness and sadness. Here's why.

Sept 27, 1999, Danial entered our lives. He was 3.2kgs and was of good length (can't remember his length!). I was excited, not even the stitches from my c-section could hold me down. People who came visit was surprised that I had so much energy right after having the baby. I felt like I was ready for motherhood and couldn't wait to be the world's best mum.

Sept 13, 2001, Nur Alissa left our lives. She was 2.3kgs and was my stillborn. I was 34 weeks and had 6 more weeks to go before my due date. My gynae had a scientific term as to how the baby died in my womb, but it didn't matter. I was grieving, and wasn't interested to really know how it happened, just why it was happening to me.

We still talk about our Baby Lisa to Danial and even to Sara. We, or rather I, want to be sure that Baby Lisa is remembered by her siblings. They may not have any emotional attachment to her, but she's still a part of our family.

Al-fatiha for Baby Lisa. May we reunite in Jannah. Ameen.