If you lived in Singapore, have you tried going into Starbucks at Holland Village on a school day? Let me tell you that that place is filled with students from schools around that area - preppy and populated by rich kids. And true to form, that Starbucks was swarmed with teenagers in school uniforms nursing lattes and frappucinos that cost nearly $10 each, with some partaking on desserts that cost almost that much. That's easily $20 gone in one sitting. I did a quick scan and saw that they all had designer school bags.
Because we are old fogeys, my girlfriend and I whom I met up there were tsk-tsking those kids, wondering how much allowance they must have received from their rich parents to be able to splurge on such luxuries.
I tell that story because this morning, Danial realised he has no more allowance in his wallet just before he left for school. He gets slightly over a dollar everyday and we give him his allowance at the start of the week for the entire week. Farah gets her allowance weekly, too.
So when they realise they have overspent before the week is over, they are literally left to their own device in making sure they have food to eat and water to drink during recess and in between extra lessons in the afternoon. It doesn't happen very often, but enough times for them to realise it's not something that they can negotiate with the husband and I. We don't want them to think the Bank of Mummy and Daddy is always open.
I love watching Suze Orman. I think she gives funny but good financial advice. And one that struck close to my heart is her advice that kids should not expect an allowance, and one that magically increases year on year. They need to work for it. I like that idea. I might ask them to make sure they do their chores before they get their allowance for that week.
Tough? It's tough love.
3 comments:
When I was a child/teenager, I didn't receive a weekly allowance. To be honest, I don't really recall many times when I needed an allowance although, obviously, as I grew older, there was more and more need for me to have some pocket change on me. My mom always made my lunch for me, which I took to school (as did about half of all the students there). Having the lunch, in essence, made the allowance irrelevant.
When you say that you leave your kids to their own devices to provide for their own lunches and drinks at school because they've blown their allowance, I have an odd feeling. I don't think I could do that for my child. I understand your reasoning and, believe me, experiences as a child deeply ingrained the habit of saving money in me. (You should see my coin collections in the bedroom. ;) ) But I'm not sure that I could say, "Sorry, kiddo, too bad you blew through your allowance, get your own meal."
Actually, I do say those things but I also make sure they bring enough food to last them through the day. So that might mean a waterbottle that's filled to the brim, enough snacks and a good-size sandwich. I might even persuade them to bring a piece of fruit, too.
It was hard to do in the beginning because the thought of your child going hungry is quite terrible. And it's so much easier to give them that extra dollar or so, but I don't think that will help them in the long run. Now that we've done it a few times, they know what to do.
And if they wanted to buy that cute mechanical pencils or erasers (why do school bookshops tempt kids?) then, they'd need to manage it within what they have.
Trying to teach them to differentiate between want and need. And it's not easy...
i like ur justifications on leaving them to their own devices. i tried to teach my 2yr-old kid that he just cant get any toy he touches, and we did successfully deviate him to look at other stuffs. but with him staying with my parents, all that efforts have gone down the drain sadly. My dad is a wuss. he cant say no to the kid.what he wants, he gets.most of the time.
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