My family and I are touchy-feely people. We like to give each other hugs and kisses and we say "I love you" to each other all the time. I say "I love you" to all three kids on different occasions and usually I get the two younger ones reciprocating by saying "I love you too, mummy moo." Farah usually says "Oh OK," as a reply. I never pushed the issue, never asked her why she doesn't reply the way I think (or rather, hope) she would reply. I used to get annoyed and even irritated that she is stingy with her expressions of love and affection to the people who love her dearly. But I also know I have to be patient and when she's ready, she will. And last night, before I drove off to the airport to catch a plane to Sydney, she was ready.
The husband was away too and I told her I depend on her to make sure the two kiddies do not drive the helper round the bend and stress Atok and Nenek too much with their antics. She said OK. I hugged and kissed her and said "Love you, Kak." I thought I heard her mumble something but she looked away and moved off before I could ask her.
Tonight I called the kids from Sydney. Everything sounds like they are under control. So I ended my chats with each child with a "I love you and see you tomorrow". And tonight, I was rewarded with a "Love you too, mummy." Loud and clear. From Farah. The daughter I have had to try harder to win over. Alhamdulillah :')
Showing posts with label kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kids. Show all posts
Monday, November 15, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
Bullied
There's been so much news from the US on bullying recently that caused these bullied kids to take their own life. It's scary how evil some kids could be.
Until recently, Sara was a target for a bully in her class. I didn't think much about Sara's complaining of a certain classmate who took liberties with deciding when they were friends and when they're not. Usually that classmate decision is based on who will do what for her. Interestingly, that classmate was then given some responsibilities which included writing down names of misbehaving students and reporting them to their teacher. And as it turns out, the days when Sara (and others in the class) who were deemed as not being her friend, these kids get reported to the discipline teacher as being "naughty" and "misbehaved".
It reached to a point where Sara started crying her eyes out about going to school. In the beginning, the husband and I thought she was just finding an excuse not to go to school because she had forgotten a homework or whatever. She's never actually told us why she'd refuse to go to school on some days. We also started noticing that she was asking for extra pocket money and when not given, made it a point to make sure she brought a sandwich to school.
So, this mother finally sat up and took notice when, in one of her crying fits refusing to go to school, Sara finally told me about this particular girl in her class who have been rotating between telling other classmates to ostracise Sara when she refused to do something bully girl wanted, to reporting Sara for something she didn't do to getting her lunch money taken away from her.
It was intervention time and I brought her to school and asked to see the class teacher. The teacher was so surprised to hear about the reasons that have led to the crying fits and promised to keep a closer eye on the two girls (yeah, the bully's a girl) and will also inform the bully's mum - who just happened to be a teacher in the same school who - guess what - is the discipline teacher.
Things seemed to improved for Sara after the chat I had with her class teacher. Sara is keeping her distance from the bully and apparently, other kids have now also come up to the class teacher to tell her the terror that reigned.
And if you thought the story ended there...guess again. While the bullying in school has stopped, it continued on facebook. OK, disclaimer - Sara has a facebook account but mostly to indulge in some harmless game and I do monitor her page closely. She only has access to it on school holidays.
So, getting back to the story, the bully starting leaving hate messages on Sara's facebook wall, such as "I hate you" etc. Because I wanted to empower Sara to learn to fight this bully directly, I've asked Sara to report back to the teacher and then remove this girl from her friend list. So it looks like that worked.
I still don't know how and why a kid could behave the way Sara's class bully behaved. It would be interesting to find out.
Until recently, Sara was a target for a bully in her class. I didn't think much about Sara's complaining of a certain classmate who took liberties with deciding when they were friends and when they're not. Usually that classmate decision is based on who will do what for her. Interestingly, that classmate was then given some responsibilities which included writing down names of misbehaving students and reporting them to their teacher. And as it turns out, the days when Sara (and others in the class) who were deemed as not being her friend, these kids get reported to the discipline teacher as being "naughty" and "misbehaved".
It reached to a point where Sara started crying her eyes out about going to school. In the beginning, the husband and I thought she was just finding an excuse not to go to school because she had forgotten a homework or whatever. She's never actually told us why she'd refuse to go to school on some days. We also started noticing that she was asking for extra pocket money and when not given, made it a point to make sure she brought a sandwich to school.
So, this mother finally sat up and took notice when, in one of her crying fits refusing to go to school, Sara finally told me about this particular girl in her class who have been rotating between telling other classmates to ostracise Sara when she refused to do something bully girl wanted, to reporting Sara for something she didn't do to getting her lunch money taken away from her.
It was intervention time and I brought her to school and asked to see the class teacher. The teacher was so surprised to hear about the reasons that have led to the crying fits and promised to keep a closer eye on the two girls (yeah, the bully's a girl) and will also inform the bully's mum - who just happened to be a teacher in the same school who - guess what - is the discipline teacher.
Things seemed to improved for Sara after the chat I had with her class teacher. Sara is keeping her distance from the bully and apparently, other kids have now also come up to the class teacher to tell her the terror that reigned.
And if you thought the story ended there...guess again. While the bullying in school has stopped, it continued on facebook. OK, disclaimer - Sara has a facebook account but mostly to indulge in some harmless game and I do monitor her page closely. She only has access to it on school holidays.
So, getting back to the story, the bully starting leaving hate messages on Sara's facebook wall, such as "I hate you" etc. Because I wanted to empower Sara to learn to fight this bully directly, I've asked Sara to report back to the teacher and then remove this girl from her friend list. So it looks like that worked.
I still don't know how and why a kid could behave the way Sara's class bully behaved. It would be interesting to find out.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Of cavities and swollen cheek
Prior to our week-long holiday in Melaka and Kuala Lumpur, the kids knew they had a visit to the dentist when we came back. Except for Farah, who was with her school drama club in an exchange programme in Adelaide. Can I just quickly digress that I am *amazed* at these so-called school trips. When I was in school, the furthest we went was Melaka and that was a treat. These days, schools take kids to ALL OVER the world. I know kids who went to New Zealand, Portugal and China with their school. Schools must be the next big target for travel agencies! We paid close to $2K for Farah's trip and she was going to stay with a family for 5 days and in a 3 star motel for only 2 days. The husband thinks its a rip-off but we couldn't quite get another travel agency to provide us with a cheaper quote, could we?
Anyway, back to the story. So the other two kids had the dentist look at their little pearlies. Sara went first and I thought it would be a breeze. The kid has white baby teeth brushes religiously. But no. She had two cavities - each on the left and right molar. One had a broken filling and another which was close to the nerves and would require a root canal. The thing about kid-friendly dentist is they distract the kids with a huge screen that can play any movie on-demand and for Sara, she gets a funky looking heart-shaped sunglasses as well to wear. She was happy with Barbie playing on the big screen and didn't know what the dentist was saying to me. I said no to the root canal, I said we'll leave that for another time. In fact, I suggested extraction instead but the dentist did warn me it could create alignment problems later on and I acknowledged that but sheesh, a root canal for a 7-year old was too cruel I thought. So, the dentist went on to fill the other cavity only to find that they need to clean the cavity and it was close to a nerve too. By that time, I was feeling rather cold and faint while Sara still had NO idea.
To cut a long story short, the topical anesthesia didn't work. A couple of screams and Noooos later, she was injected twice to block the nerves completely. Sara was crying and I was almost lying on the dentist chair next to Sara to calm her down. But a super trooper that she was, she held on to me and stayed on until the entire procedure was done.
When we left the dentist, she still couldn't feel her cheeks and as a result kept biting into her lips and cheeks that she's now ended up with a swollen lip and cheek. She's now frighten of dentists and I'm not quite sure how I'm going to get her to return to extract that other molar. Hmmm.
Danial had it easy. His adult teeth were cleaned and polished and he's thinking his now-sparkling smile will quite blind us. I should've asked for the heart-shaped sunglasses to bring home.
PS: Do you like my new template?? After five-plus years, I think this blog could do with a refreshed look, don't you think?
Anyway, back to the story. So the other two kids had the dentist look at their little pearlies. Sara went first and I thought it would be a breeze. The kid has white baby teeth brushes religiously. But no. She had two cavities - each on the left and right molar. One had a broken filling and another which was close to the nerves and would require a root canal. The thing about kid-friendly dentist is they distract the kids with a huge screen that can play any movie on-demand and for Sara, she gets a funky looking heart-shaped sunglasses as well to wear. She was happy with Barbie playing on the big screen and didn't know what the dentist was saying to me. I said no to the root canal, I said we'll leave that for another time. In fact, I suggested extraction instead but the dentist did warn me it could create alignment problems later on and I acknowledged that but sheesh, a root canal for a 7-year old was too cruel I thought. So, the dentist went on to fill the other cavity only to find that they need to clean the cavity and it was close to a nerve too. By that time, I was feeling rather cold and faint while Sara still had NO idea.
To cut a long story short, the topical anesthesia didn't work. A couple of screams and Noooos later, she was injected twice to block the nerves completely. Sara was crying and I was almost lying on the dentist chair next to Sara to calm her down. But a super trooper that she was, she held on to me and stayed on until the entire procedure was done.
When we left the dentist, she still couldn't feel her cheeks and as a result kept biting into her lips and cheeks that she's now ended up with a swollen lip and cheek. She's now frighten of dentists and I'm not quite sure how I'm going to get her to return to extract that other molar. Hmmm.
Danial had it easy. His adult teeth were cleaned and polished and he's thinking his now-sparkling smile will quite blind us. I should've asked for the heart-shaped sunglasses to bring home.
PS: Do you like my new template?? After five-plus years, I think this blog could do with a refreshed look, don't you think?
Monday, June 14, 2010
Where's the karate?
We brought the kids to watch The Karate Kid movie - along with the Bhutias who came to visit us. All five kids were dying to watch Jaden Smith and the husband and Mr Bhutia are a long-time fans of Jackie Chan. Mrs Bhutia and I were outnumbered and we simply followed the crowd.
So considering it was Sat night and the movie was apparently popular, most of the cineplexes were sold out but the kids were in luck and we ended up in a nearby cineplex where we could get decent seats for all nine of us. So while I was watching the movie (way past my bedtime) I couldn't help but think if Jackie would make a good Mr Miyagi.
Then it occured to me. While the "earlier" Karate Kid movies were on karate, this movie is all about KUNG-FU set in China. Talk about a deceiving title. Buyers beware!
The kids thought the movie was hugely entertaining. The two daddies were quite pleased with the kung-fu action. I was being a cranky old lady and was mildly entertained. The popcorn was good though.
So considering it was Sat night and the movie was apparently popular, most of the cineplexes were sold out but the kids were in luck and we ended up in a nearby cineplex where we could get decent seats for all nine of us. So while I was watching the movie (way past my bedtime) I couldn't help but think if Jackie would make a good Mr Miyagi.
Then it occured to me. While the "earlier" Karate Kid movies were on karate, this movie is all about KUNG-FU set in China. Talk about a deceiving title. Buyers beware!
The kids thought the movie was hugely entertaining. The two daddies were quite pleased with the kung-fu action. I was being a cranky old lady and was mildly entertained. The popcorn was good though.
Wednesday, June 09, 2010
Maid-to-order
I never knew disciplining a kid could make me laugh-out-loud. No, I am not being sadistic and no feelings were hurt, except for Sara's. But I think she will laugh about this when she's older too.
Our story starts with Sara doing her homework in my room. I was working from home and was keeping an eye on the work she was doing while reading and reporting on a report - I know, reporting on a report sounds silly but it's part of what I need to do for work. Anyhow, Sara went from sitting next to me, to sprawling on the floor to climbing into my bed. The result of that trail is a mess that covered most part of my room. So I had to then supervise her to clean the room.
Cleaning up includes removing the eraser bits that were all over the floor with a small broom, to putting my pillows back properly on my bed to throwing out used papers. After two sets of instructions the little girl was getting moody. She started to stomp her feet and glare at me. When I asked her what's wrong, what came out of her mouth was nothing short of amazement. She said, "Why do you treat me like a maid?!" My immediate reaction was a guffaw which was not appreciated because she stomped out of my room cyring and I later heard her complaining to my mother.
After a few minutes, I went to her room and tried to explain to her why she had to clean up. Her defence was since it was my room which was messy, then I have to clean up because it was MY room. This is because she has to clean her own room and she's never asked me to clean HER room. Of course the fact that she messed my room up is immaterial at this stage. So in the end, she did finish cleaning up the mess, albeit grudgingly.
That evening, I was tucking her in and saw a piece of paper in her room and saw her scribblings on it. I picked it up and all was revealed:
"My mother trits me like a maid! She said I must clean up her room. It is HER room and I have to clean it up?! She is so bossy! My bibik is not even trited like a mid but I am. And the worse part? She didn't even say thank you! And that is so rud. And she always remind me to say thank you! I am so angry."
Kid, you have no idea how cute you are.
Our story starts with Sara doing her homework in my room. I was working from home and was keeping an eye on the work she was doing while reading and reporting on a report - I know, reporting on a report sounds silly but it's part of what I need to do for work. Anyhow, Sara went from sitting next to me, to sprawling on the floor to climbing into my bed. The result of that trail is a mess that covered most part of my room. So I had to then supervise her to clean the room.
Cleaning up includes removing the eraser bits that were all over the floor with a small broom, to putting my pillows back properly on my bed to throwing out used papers. After two sets of instructions the little girl was getting moody. She started to stomp her feet and glare at me. When I asked her what's wrong, what came out of her mouth was nothing short of amazement. She said, "Why do you treat me like a maid?!" My immediate reaction was a guffaw which was not appreciated because she stomped out of my room cyring and I later heard her complaining to my mother.
After a few minutes, I went to her room and tried to explain to her why she had to clean up. Her defence was since it was my room which was messy, then I have to clean up because it was MY room. This is because she has to clean her own room and she's never asked me to clean HER room. Of course the fact that she messed my room up is immaterial at this stage. So in the end, she did finish cleaning up the mess, albeit grudgingly.
That evening, I was tucking her in and saw a piece of paper in her room and saw her scribblings on it. I picked it up and all was revealed:
"My mother trits me like a maid! She said I must clean up her room. It is HER room and I have to clean it up?! She is so bossy! My bibik is not even trited like a mid but I am. And the worse part? She didn't even say thank you! And that is so rud. And she always remind me to say thank you! I am so angry."
Kid, you have no idea how cute you are.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Contagious
Just when I thought that my son is the only one in the family with a bad case of cornyjokelitis, I discoverd to my horror that the condition might be contagious and the latest victiom is the littlest girl in the house. And it's looking worse than I could ever imagine.
Her: Mummy, why can't the zebra cross the road?
Here we go...
Me: Because there is no zebra crossing?
Her: Good try, but no.
Me: OK, tell me the answer?
Her: Because the zebra could not bring herself to step on another zebra who's crossing the road because that other zebra is actually a zebra crossing. Geddit mummy, geddit?
And in her gentlest voice, out came a shocking BWAHAHAHA.
Sigh.
Her: Mummy, why can't the zebra cross the road?
Here we go...
Me: Because there is no zebra crossing?
Her: Good try, but no.
Me: OK, tell me the answer?
Her: Because the zebra could not bring herself to step on another zebra who's crossing the road because that other zebra is actually a zebra crossing. Geddit mummy, geddit?
And in her gentlest voice, out came a shocking BWAHAHAHA.
Sigh.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Corny lives here
My son, has the potential to be one of Jay Leno's writers when he grows up. He just needs a lot of time polishing his talent and soon, he'll be ready. I think. In the meantime, here are some of jokes he regaled us with.
What starts with "T", ends with "T" and is filled with "T"?
(After every riddle, he asks, "Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Tea-pot!!
(And each time he gives you the answer, it has to be followed by a huge BWA-HAHAHA, and usually it's just his and the husband's)
What do you call a mouse who's just had a shower?
("Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Squeaky clean!
(BWA-HAHAHA)
How do you make a tissue paper dance?
("Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Put some booger in it!
(BWA-HAHAHA)
What starts with "T", ends with "T" and is filled with "T"?
(After every riddle, he asks, "Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Tea-pot!!
(And each time he gives you the answer, it has to be followed by a huge BWA-HAHAHA, and usually it's just his and the husband's)
What do you call a mouse who's just had a shower?
("Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Squeaky clean!
(BWA-HAHAHA)
How do you make a tissue paper dance?
("Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Put some booger in it!
(BWA-HAHAHA)
Thursday, February 25, 2010
The birds and the whaaat??
I cannot believe this is the time. This week alone (and this week is not even DONE yet) I have had two kids come to me to ask me about the birds and the, yes.
First off, a cranky Farah rolled herself to my room one night. Eyes squinting. Body slouched. As she approached me, she slouched even more, and dramatically threw herself on my bed. She closed her eyes as she muttered the words that shocked me.
"Mummy, please do not sign me up for any more sex education class. I want to opt out the next one. PLEEAASE!," she pleaded. Of course such theatrics should be matched with more theatrics and so turned my head and said, "Huh, what? You had sex ed? Today? In school I hope!"
"YES, I did and that's because you said I should attend. It was disgusting. They showed us all how to put a c/ond/om over a banana! Like, YUCK! It's GROSS!" And as she was rolling in MY bed, ruffling up my clean and tightly pulled bedsheet, she pleaded with more gusto about getting out of the next one. Which will be held, get this. Next year. I'm all for future planning so I gave her a break and told her OK, I will opt her out.
The second chapter to this story starts with me and Danial at the supermarket. We were getting ready for a barbeque that night and I was buying stuff to you know, barbeque.
As we were waiting in line to pay for our groceries, I saw Danial eyeing the candy just before we got to the cash register. I was ready to tell him no to chocolates or sweets.
Him: Why are c/o/nd/oms so expensive?
Me: No sweets or chocolates before dinner. We are having a barbeque tonight and your uncle is making creme bru...huh? What did you say??
Him: Co/nd/oms. Why are they expensive?
There's me, looking at the sweets and chocolates that are lined up nicely and just above them, there they were. Multiple types with a variety of colours and flavours.
Me: Er, I don't know why they cost that much. But, wait what do you know about them? Who taught you?
Him: I first thought they were sweets and I asked *elder cousin boy A* if those tastes good. And he laughed at me saying those are not sweets. He told me what these are called.
Me: What else did he tell you? At this point, I started to notice a young mother who was behind me listening to our conversation and the elderly man in front of us, grinning. Why? I don't know...
Him: Nothing. He told me what it's for. It just sounds gross.
Because I am a glutton for punishment, I had to ask
Me: What is it for?
Him: For men to wear over his ...
Me: Okay fine, you know what it's for. Just so you know, you are too young to think about...
Him: Mummy, I just told you it's gross. I don't know why adults do what they do to make babies.
At that point, I think the boy has heard enough (I know I had) and decided to let the matter rest by asking him to help me carry some of the groceries.
Next time anyone asks me, I'll tell them to speak to their father! That or distract them with some candy.
Monday, February 01, 2010
Hmmm
Besides stating the obvious such as "What? It's February ALREADY?" or "I haven't updated this blog for how long now?" I feel like I've been sucked into what some would call "daily routine" and have had no time for anything else.
If I hadn't said it before, Sara is quite enjoying her new school. She did make me nervous by saying her teachers are "grumpy" and "yell a lot" and I thought, oh no...she's going to ask to go back to her old school. Or when she came home and asked me what the words "chewren" and "tarme" mean because she heard some teachers used them and I thought, oh no...I will have to send her back to her old school.
While that child is nicely adapting to her new routine, I had a naughty little boy who misbehaved. We found out Danial has been nicely going to school with his school t-shirt everyday when students are only allowed to be in t-shirt on PE days. His logic when we asked why he'd done that? Was simply, the weather is too hot to be wearing collared shirt and he didn't like being all sweaty and hot. But rules, they are meant to be obeyed so we told him no-go but made a deal that he could change into his t-shirt when he walks to my SIL's after school.
We also caught him covertly playing computer games when he's not supposed to and skipping homework. I was floored; what happened to the sweet little boy I used to know? So in the end, his CPU is now sitting nicely in my room and the husband and I check his school bag daily to ensure he's done what he needs to do.
Besides all these drama, both Sara and Danial have one thing in common. They both want to quit Kumon. Whines such as the worksheets are too difficult and there isn't enough time to complete the worksheets where met with rational counter reasons. I know I sound like a crazy mum, but the worksheets only take less than half hour to complete and they have enough time for TV, ride their bicycles and read daily. They are resisting the discipline that is needed to complete the worksheets and that is the one thing that will help them succeed in life. Talent without discipline amounts to nothing, I told them with my sage hat firmly on my head.
Danial is still being observed. He'll need to earn our trust to be able to get his little luxuries back. And he knows that too. While Farah didn't have too bad of a teenage rebellion, I half suspect this time around, the teenage typhoon will hit us harder with this little boy. Sigh.
If I hadn't said it before, Sara is quite enjoying her new school. She did make me nervous by saying her teachers are "grumpy" and "yell a lot" and I thought, oh no...she's going to ask to go back to her old school. Or when she came home and asked me what the words "chewren" and "tarme" mean because she heard some teachers used them and I thought, oh no...I will have to send her back to her old school.
While that child is nicely adapting to her new routine, I had a naughty little boy who misbehaved. We found out Danial has been nicely going to school with his school t-shirt everyday when students are only allowed to be in t-shirt on PE days. His logic when we asked why he'd done that? Was simply, the weather is too hot to be wearing collared shirt and he didn't like being all sweaty and hot. But rules, they are meant to be obeyed so we told him no-go but made a deal that he could change into his t-shirt when he walks to my SIL's after school.
We also caught him covertly playing computer games when he's not supposed to and skipping homework. I was floored; what happened to the sweet little boy I used to know? So in the end, his CPU is now sitting nicely in my room and the husband and I check his school bag daily to ensure he's done what he needs to do.
Besides all these drama, both Sara and Danial have one thing in common. They both want to quit Kumon. Whines such as the worksheets are too difficult and there isn't enough time to complete the worksheets where met with rational counter reasons. I know I sound like a crazy mum, but the worksheets only take less than half hour to complete and they have enough time for TV, ride their bicycles and read daily. They are resisting the discipline that is needed to complete the worksheets and that is the one thing that will help them succeed in life. Talent without discipline amounts to nothing, I told them with my sage hat firmly on my head.
Danial is still being observed. He'll need to earn our trust to be able to get his little luxuries back. And he knows that too. While Farah didn't have too bad of a teenage rebellion, I half suspect this time around, the teenage typhoon will hit us harder with this little boy. Sigh.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Easy does it
The revisions with Sara are going well, alhamdulillah. We are now going into chapter two of Pri 2 maths topic. She's gaining some confidence and I am thrilled to bits.
JDsg, you would be pleased to know that I took your advice to heart and she has been taught one way of solving a particular maths problem and that seemed to clear LOTS of confusion. Jazakallah for the tip!
Sara also received compliments from her ustazah during her Iqra' lessons. She wasn't reading well and was dragging her feet during Iqra so when she did read well, the ustazah took advantage of it and praised her in front of the other kids and that pleased Sara very much. Pleased me, too :)
So it seems we have achieved some success with her. She is looking forward to going to her new school, in her new uniform and riding that school bus. What is the attraction with school bus, I might never understand since I walked to school until I was 12 and then took the public bus when I was 13 onwards.
The kids and I also got to bake some cookies and cupcakes when I took a couple of days' off from work. I must say, I could do with more SAHM days...besides spending time with the kids, those afternoon naps are delightful and decadent!
JDsg, you would be pleased to know that I took your advice to heart and she has been taught one way of solving a particular maths problem and that seemed to clear LOTS of confusion. Jazakallah for the tip!
Sara also received compliments from her ustazah during her Iqra' lessons. She wasn't reading well and was dragging her feet during Iqra so when she did read well, the ustazah took advantage of it and praised her in front of the other kids and that pleased Sara very much. Pleased me, too :)
So it seems we have achieved some success with her. She is looking forward to going to her new school, in her new uniform and riding that school bus. What is the attraction with school bus, I might never understand since I walked to school until I was 12 and then took the public bus when I was 13 onwards.
The kids and I also got to bake some cookies and cupcakes when I took a couple of days' off from work. I must say, I could do with more SAHM days...besides spending time with the kids, those afternoon naps are delightful and decadent!
Wednesday, December 02, 2009
It's Dec? Already?
I can't believe we are already at the last month of the year!
The kids are enjoying themselves during the holidays, surrounded by cousins and other adults in the family. Some stayed over, some came over. Our neighbour's kids are also now part of the motley crue.
Sara is soldiering on with her revisions and I intend to expose her to some of the Pr 2 topics this month. No rush, we are taking it slow and steady. She's only had one tantrum about studying - when everyone else had completed their one-hour of reading time and were going to go outside to skateboard while she hadn't finished her work. It was tough and involved tears. But insha Allah, that would be the last tantrum. And she will (finally) turn seven in about two weeks' time. Only to join a group of 8 year olds next year at school. Sigh.
Speaking of which, I have moved her to a school nearer to our house. She's going to be taking the school bus and if she had additional school activities, it would be easy enough for the helper to send her to or fetch her from school as the school is only a 5-minute walk from the train station. I'm hoping the new school and environment would be better for her. Please keep her in your prayers.
Sara and I baked a strawberry cake. For real, people. With lots of help from my best bud in the kitchen. Her name is Betty Crocker. The cake turned out beautifully and my confidence in baking is slowly being restored and I am forever indebted to Betty. I am planning to bake some cookies before the month ends. If I don't blog about my cooking adventure, you would know what means because if it was a resounding success, there would be pictorial evidence on this blog.
We've got lots of activities planned out for the kids and the only thing that's standing between us and those plans is TIME. Or more specifically, the husband's and mine. We don't have much leave left to take so we are being very strategic using our leave days.
My parents will insha Allah be moving in this weekend. My mum has packed her beloved chinaware and these are safely kept in my kitchen but apart from that, my parents haven't packed a single thing. But I think once I get them here, we can slowly move their stuff over and by January, they would be ready to rent their place out.
So as you can see, there are lots to do and too little time to do them. And when things are less hectic, the sounds of cricket on this blog would be less frequent.
The kids are enjoying themselves during the holidays, surrounded by cousins and other adults in the family. Some stayed over, some came over. Our neighbour's kids are also now part of the motley crue.
Sara is soldiering on with her revisions and I intend to expose her to some of the Pr 2 topics this month. No rush, we are taking it slow and steady. She's only had one tantrum about studying - when everyone else had completed their one-hour of reading time and were going to go outside to skateboard while she hadn't finished her work. It was tough and involved tears. But insha Allah, that would be the last tantrum. And she will (finally) turn seven in about two weeks' time. Only to join a group of 8 year olds next year at school. Sigh.
Speaking of which, I have moved her to a school nearer to our house. She's going to be taking the school bus and if she had additional school activities, it would be easy enough for the helper to send her to or fetch her from school as the school is only a 5-minute walk from the train station. I'm hoping the new school and environment would be better for her. Please keep her in your prayers.
Sara and I baked a strawberry cake. For real, people. With lots of help from my best bud in the kitchen. Her name is Betty Crocker. The cake turned out beautifully and my confidence in baking is slowly being restored and I am forever indebted to Betty. I am planning to bake some cookies before the month ends. If I don't blog about my cooking adventure, you would know what means because if it was a resounding success, there would be pictorial evidence on this blog.
We've got lots of activities planned out for the kids and the only thing that's standing between us and those plans is TIME. Or more specifically, the husband's and mine. We don't have much leave left to take so we are being very strategic using our leave days.
My parents will insha Allah be moving in this weekend. My mum has packed her beloved chinaware and these are safely kept in my kitchen but apart from that, my parents haven't packed a single thing. But I think once I get them here, we can slowly move their stuff over and by January, they would be ready to rent their place out.
So as you can see, there are lots to do and too little time to do them. And when things are less hectic, the sounds of cricket on this blog would be less frequent.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Learning from failure
The kids are back with their final year exam results. The two older kids did well enough, we set out targets earlier on in the year and they both pretty much got the grades that were expected of them. Sara didn't. She did extremely well for her language papers but did not pass her math exams. Sigh.
I thought she might just scrape through, but failing maths at primary 1 is like a slap on the face. Mine, I mean. She was visibly upset when she told me, so at least she knew the repercussion of not passing her exam. But she got over it quickly and was on to the next thing that caught her attention. And so, I do what I do best. I analyse (ok, the husband said unhealthily over-analysing at the most micro-level, but hey, I can't help it).
While I have been trying (and the key word here is *try*) to teach Sara mathematical concepts (that I was once bewildered with and subsequently hated with all my heart and soul), I have also been painfully aware that I was losing her interest. All the drills we were going through, I was questioning if they were helping. And on the day she came home with her result, I got my answer, loud and crystal clear.
I know I have to change my teaching style and I have been having conversations with her tutor and Kumon instructor, too. Sara is better at languages because the words describe a story to her. A story that she can act out in her head and she is free to use her active imagination and different words to describe what's going on in the theatre that exists in her mind.
I *need* to make Maths appeal to her that way. I need to make it fun for her. She's a kinesthetic learner and while she can sit down and do math drills for a little while, she is doing it because she is an obedient child, not because she thinks she's learning anything new. In other words, she is not engaged.
So this school holiday that's coming up, in addition to her Kumon worksheets (which is helping her with speed and accuracy) and tuition, we are to:
- bake cookies and cupcakes; so that she learns mass/weight and after baking we can learn division concepts
- sing songs about multiplication tables (*do not laugh* but I have bought a teaching aid which I think might just do the trick)
- walk to the park so that we may collect different types of leaves and learn division concepts and ordinal numbers from our leaf collection
- cook noodles and spaghetti, before which we study lengths
- play shopping so that we can learn counting money
- play teacher, where she will teach me maths :)
I'm hoping these would go someway into making her understand and more importantly, interested, in maths. I want to make sure she is starting primary two on the right footing, despite her primary 1 maths grade. Insha Allah. So please send me your du'a, prayers or magic dust.
I thought she might just scrape through, but failing maths at primary 1 is like a slap on the face. Mine, I mean. She was visibly upset when she told me, so at least she knew the repercussion of not passing her exam. But she got over it quickly and was on to the next thing that caught her attention. And so, I do what I do best. I analyse (ok, the husband said unhealthily over-analysing at the most micro-level, but hey, I can't help it).
While I have been trying (and the key word here is *try*) to teach Sara mathematical concepts (that I was once bewildered with and subsequently hated with all my heart and soul), I have also been painfully aware that I was losing her interest. All the drills we were going through, I was questioning if they were helping. And on the day she came home with her result, I got my answer, loud and crystal clear.
I know I have to change my teaching style and I have been having conversations with her tutor and Kumon instructor, too. Sara is better at languages because the words describe a story to her. A story that she can act out in her head and she is free to use her active imagination and different words to describe what's going on in the theatre that exists in her mind.
I *need* to make Maths appeal to her that way. I need to make it fun for her. She's a kinesthetic learner and while she can sit down and do math drills for a little while, she is doing it because she is an obedient child, not because she thinks she's learning anything new. In other words, she is not engaged.
So this school holiday that's coming up, in addition to her Kumon worksheets (which is helping her with speed and accuracy) and tuition, we are to:
- bake cookies and cupcakes; so that she learns mass/weight and after baking we can learn division concepts
- sing songs about multiplication tables (*do not laugh* but I have bought a teaching aid which I think might just do the trick)
- walk to the park so that we may collect different types of leaves and learn division concepts and ordinal numbers from our leaf collection
- cook noodles and spaghetti, before which we study lengths
- play shopping so that we can learn counting money
- play teacher, where she will teach me maths :)
I'm hoping these would go someway into making her understand and more importantly, interested, in maths. I want to make sure she is starting primary two on the right footing, despite her primary 1 maths grade. Insha Allah. So please send me your du'a, prayers or magic dust.
Monday, October 26, 2009
And yes, I am exaggerating
But not by that much, really.
The trip to the Indonesian embassy was made memorable as I was interviewed by two different officers on how and why the passport went missing. Like, hello? I don't want to get all defensive but the key words were "moved house" and "passport missing" and I have only repeated it all afternoon. I told them we discovered the passport was missing a week before we made the police report as we wanted to make sure we went through all of the boxes. Only to be told that I should've waited for a month before declaring the passport lost. If looks could kill, I would've been held for murder.
The second interview was with another officer who wanted to know how much I paid my helper and how often she gets her day off. Which were harmless questions but I wasn't in a sociable mood anymore, after five hours of mostly waiting, at the embassy. And then of course, I read a story like this which makes me angry because again, employers of domestic helpers need all the bad rep they can get, right?
Preparing Sara for her math exam is taking its toll on me. I have had two bouts of migraine and I think I have finally suitably confused her with my explanations and terrified of me getting all upset when she still doesn't get the concept I was trying to desperately explain to her. I am just thankful that she doesn't need much help with her languages and that we only need to focus on Maths. I am trying very hard to keep my eyes on the ball here.
And Farah has completed her exams but is throwing herself (far too much, I think) in her school drama club. I got really upset when she came home way after dinner and didn't even bother to call to let me know. I hit the roof and gave her a piece of my mind, resulting in much pouting and sulking (her, not me).
The husband will be back tomorrow and it can't come sooner because I am about ready to collapse. And that, is no exaggeration.
The trip to the Indonesian embassy was made memorable as I was interviewed by two different officers on how and why the passport went missing. Like, hello? I don't want to get all defensive but the key words were "moved house" and "passport missing" and I have only repeated it all afternoon. I told them we discovered the passport was missing a week before we made the police report as we wanted to make sure we went through all of the boxes. Only to be told that I should've waited for a month before declaring the passport lost. If looks could kill, I would've been held for murder.
The second interview was with another officer who wanted to know how much I paid my helper and how often she gets her day off. Which were harmless questions but I wasn't in a sociable mood anymore, after five hours of mostly waiting, at the embassy. And then of course, I read a story like this which makes me angry because again, employers of domestic helpers need all the bad rep they can get, right?
Preparing Sara for her math exam is taking its toll on me. I have had two bouts of migraine and I think I have finally suitably confused her with my explanations and terrified of me getting all upset when she still doesn't get the concept I was trying to desperately explain to her. I am just thankful that she doesn't need much help with her languages and that we only need to focus on Maths. I am trying very hard to keep my eyes on the ball here.
And Farah has completed her exams but is throwing herself (far too much, I think) in her school drama club. I got really upset when she came home way after dinner and didn't even bother to call to let me know. I hit the roof and gave her a piece of my mind, resulting in much pouting and sulking (her, not me).
The husband will be back tomorrow and it can't come sooner because I am about ready to collapse. And that, is no exaggeration.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
We like to move it move it
And moving is exactly what we are doing today and tomorrow, insha Allah.
Feels strange to be surrounded by boxes. I took a look at the number of boxes and was shocked to see how much we've accumulated all these years. Some of the lighter and smaller boxes we've carted almost every evening to the new house because, you know, we are excited like that. I was (still am, at the point of writing this) the last person to pack my clothes. Having said that, I have packed *some* of my clothes and the husband and kids have brought them to the new house.
The strange thing is, even though we are moving to a bigger house and the wardrobe I am sharing with the husband is larger, I think we have run out of space as we've filled that wardrobe and we still have more to bring. And this is *after* I have thrown out clothes that have *ahem* shrunk in size.
Today is the deadline for me to pack my shoes. Not that I have plenty but still, I've been advised to only bring with me what I would actually wear. Hmmmm.
To dispel what would otherwise be an impression of my being disorganised, you would be pleased to know that I have arranged for the new house to have internet connection. We can surf the internet in that house right now, if we wanted to. And cable TV will be installed in the next few days. The guys who are helping me set up the wireless connection are also coming by the end of the week. Impressive, I know. You're welcome.
The husband and the helper have been doing all the heavy lifting because you know, I am delicate, like that. Nonetheless, I have been very supportive of their heavy lifting by staying out of their way.
And so tonight, we will bid our current home fare-thee-well. It housed many memories for all of us and we are sad to leave. But we are also excited to have new happy memories in the new home, insha Allah.
Feels strange to be surrounded by boxes. I took a look at the number of boxes and was shocked to see how much we've accumulated all these years. Some of the lighter and smaller boxes we've carted almost every evening to the new house because, you know, we are excited like that. I was (still am, at the point of writing this) the last person to pack my clothes. Having said that, I have packed *some* of my clothes and the husband and kids have brought them to the new house.
The strange thing is, even though we are moving to a bigger house and the wardrobe I am sharing with the husband is larger, I think we have run out of space as we've filled that wardrobe and we still have more to bring. And this is *after* I have thrown out clothes that have *ahem* shrunk in size.
Today is the deadline for me to pack my shoes. Not that I have plenty but still, I've been advised to only bring with me what I would actually wear. Hmmmm.
To dispel what would otherwise be an impression of my being disorganised, you would be pleased to know that I have arranged for the new house to have internet connection. We can surf the internet in that house right now, if we wanted to. And cable TV will be installed in the next few days. The guys who are helping me set up the wireless connection are also coming by the end of the week. Impressive, I know. You're welcome.
The husband and the helper have been doing all the heavy lifting because you know, I am delicate, like that. Nonetheless, I have been very supportive of their heavy lifting by staying out of their way.
And so tonight, we will bid our current home fare-thee-well. It housed many memories for all of us and we are sad to leave. But we are also excited to have new happy memories in the new home, insha Allah.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
The sound of silence
I try to pick Sara up from school in the evenings. The school lets parents and care givers proceed to an area near the school compound to wait for the kids, after the kids have sung the national anthem. The classes are then moved into groups to be brought to the different gates around the school, depending on where the students will be picked up. Everything is orderly.
But I get amused when the teacher who has the microphone in hand, would order the kids to "keep silent!". She would actually detain the class which she deems as making too much noise. And this happens almost every time I pick Sara up. I don't know of any school that can get kids to be silent all the time so the teacher's efforts may be futile, I think. Anyways, aren't normal happy kids supposed to be boisterous?
So this is something I don't get. I can understand if the teachers insist the kids walk instead of run - to avoid accidents. But to make sure the kids are quiet even after school hours? I don't think its necessary.
Anyhow, much to the teacher's dismay, once the kids leave the compound, you can hear laughing, talking. And that's the sound I prefer to hear.
But I get amused when the teacher who has the microphone in hand, would order the kids to "keep silent!". She would actually detain the class which she deems as making too much noise. And this happens almost every time I pick Sara up. I don't know of any school that can get kids to be silent all the time so the teacher's efforts may be futile, I think. Anyways, aren't normal happy kids supposed to be boisterous?
So this is something I don't get. I can understand if the teachers insist the kids walk instead of run - to avoid accidents. But to make sure the kids are quiet even after school hours? I don't think its necessary.
Anyhow, much to the teacher's dismay, once the kids leave the compound, you can hear laughing, talking. And that's the sound I prefer to hear.
Thursday, August 06, 2009
A deep and meaningful conversation...
Sara is down with fever. And with the husband away, she bunked in with me. We kill two birds with one stone with that. She gets to sleep in my big bed and I get to check on her all night without having to really wake up fully.
At 2am her body was so warm that I had to give her another dose of paracetamol and sponge her down. She wasn't cranky at all, in fact she enjoyed waking up in the wee hours of the morning. What would two girls do when one needs to be sponged and the other needs to do the sponging? We discuss the existence of mermaids, of course!
Her: Do mermaids exist, mummy?
Me: I don't think so, darling.
Her: Why don't you think so.
Me: Because no one has ever seen a mermaid. And the people who have explored the deepest oceans, have never seen a mermaid before.
Her: I think they do exist. I think they are very good at hiding. Just because we haven't seen mermaids, it doesn't mean they don't exist. Right, mummy?
Me: Yes, you are right.
Her: I also think the mermaids would be very sad if people don't believe they exist. I would be sad if people don't believe I exist.
Me: Hmmm.
Her: But how do you know I exist, mummy?
Me: Because you are here with me.
Her: But what if you can't see me?
Me: I would know you exist because I have seen you and will love you no matter where you are.
Her: So that's why I love mermaids. Even though I can't see them, I know they are there.
Me: But you've never seen them before.
Her: I've seen them in cartoons but I know cartoons are not real. But I know they exist. And they feel sad and happy just like you and me, mummy. And maybe, when the girl mermaid has a fever, her mummy would also sponge her and give her medicine. And maybe, just maybe mummy, she is asking her mermaid mummy if little human girls exist, too.
And hence, this is one of the reasons why I think my little girl is intelligent. Even though her brilliance is not picked up by the school benchmarks of exams and tests.
At 2am her body was so warm that I had to give her another dose of paracetamol and sponge her down. She wasn't cranky at all, in fact she enjoyed waking up in the wee hours of the morning. What would two girls do when one needs to be sponged and the other needs to do the sponging? We discuss the existence of mermaids, of course!
Her: Do mermaids exist, mummy?
Me: I don't think so, darling.
Her: Why don't you think so.
Me: Because no one has ever seen a mermaid. And the people who have explored the deepest oceans, have never seen a mermaid before.
Her: I think they do exist. I think they are very good at hiding. Just because we haven't seen mermaids, it doesn't mean they don't exist. Right, mummy?
Me: Yes, you are right.
Her: I also think the mermaids would be very sad if people don't believe they exist. I would be sad if people don't believe I exist.
Me: Hmmm.
Her: But how do you know I exist, mummy?
Me: Because you are here with me.
Her: But what if you can't see me?
Me: I would know you exist because I have seen you and will love you no matter where you are.
Her: So that's why I love mermaids. Even though I can't see them, I know they are there.
Me: But you've never seen them before.
Her: I've seen them in cartoons but I know cartoons are not real. But I know they exist. And they feel sad and happy just like you and me, mummy. And maybe, when the girl mermaid has a fever, her mummy would also sponge her and give her medicine. And maybe, just maybe mummy, she is asking her mermaid mummy if little human girls exist, too.
And hence, this is one of the reasons why I think my little girl is intelligent. Even though her brilliance is not picked up by the school benchmarks of exams and tests.
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
Tears and Fears
So after not travelling for a long while, having to pack my luggage and saying goodbye to the kids were the most painful things ever. Not to add the fact that the husband is also travelling the same week I'll be gone. Thank goodness my mother has stepped in to look after the kids.
Last night, the act of putting my clothes and getting my stuff organised proved to be a little too sad for Sara. She saw me packing and ran to my bed and buried her face in the pillows, crying soft tears. I had to fight back my own tears to soothe her. And then Danial and Farah too came to my room both teary :(
I called home this morning and my mother said Sara cried a little in the morning but was soothed and was better. She called me three times before she left for school, too. I told the kids that they could call me anytime they need. My phone bill will shoot through the roof but I think it's money well-spent.
Last night, the act of putting my clothes and getting my stuff organised proved to be a little too sad for Sara. She saw me packing and ran to my bed and buried her face in the pillows, crying soft tears. I had to fight back my own tears to soothe her. And then Danial and Farah too came to my room both teary :(
I called home this morning and my mother said Sara cried a little in the morning but was soothed and was better. She called me three times before she left for school, too. I told the kids that they could call me anytime they need. My phone bill will shoot through the roof but I think it's money well-spent.
Monday, May 04, 2009
The long weekend that was
So this weekend, Farah turned 14. As with our family tradition, there was no big party. We planned for a nice and quiet dinner together and she asked if her father could be included. If you are a new reader, just to clarify, her father and I were not married. Oops, that wasn't a good clarification. Let's try this one more time. Her father was married to the husband's late sister. They were divorced before the husband's sister passed away and custody was given to the husband. We keep in touch with him because of Farah as we didn't want her to severe ties with her dad. That would be wrong on many levels.
Anyways, we went house hunting over the long weekend. We went to see a house that the husband is absolutely crazy about. He knows I wanted somewhere near a school the younger kids could go to and a place near the train station. The place he wants is by the beach and a nature park. And yes, the area is tranquil and nice but there is no school nearby and no train station in sight. We need to take a bus to get to civilisation. I am not thrilled but the kids and him are. He's still trying to talk me round the idea. And I am letting him do that provided he tells me exactly how we're going to manage day-to-day living in that area. He thinks I'm a tough sell. I think I'm just being pragmatic.
And the rest of the long weekend was spent revising. The exams. They are just around the corner. The two older kids are coping well. Sara, well, I've been telling her to study hard, to do her best and make plenty of du'as. We've had much to study and worksheets to do from her school. She's been making great progress but I'm not sure if it's enough to stay afloat at school. The irony is she is such a personable and an incredibly inquisitive and observant child. But I guess these things don't count for much in an education system that we have here.
Anyways, we went house hunting over the long weekend. We went to see a house that the husband is absolutely crazy about. He knows I wanted somewhere near a school the younger kids could go to and a place near the train station. The place he wants is by the beach and a nature park. And yes, the area is tranquil and nice but there is no school nearby and no train station in sight. We need to take a bus to get to civilisation. I am not thrilled but the kids and him are. He's still trying to talk me round the idea. And I am letting him do that provided he tells me exactly how we're going to manage day-to-day living in that area. He thinks I'm a tough sell. I think I'm just being pragmatic.
And the rest of the long weekend was spent revising. The exams. They are just around the corner. The two older kids are coping well. Sara, well, I've been telling her to study hard, to do her best and make plenty of du'as. We've had much to study and worksheets to do from her school. She's been making great progress but I'm not sure if it's enough to stay afloat at school. The irony is she is such a personable and an incredibly inquisitive and observant child. But I guess these things don't count for much in an education system that we have here.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Post Bangkok Guest
In a nutshell, I think she had fun. And we did, too. Even Danial who weren't thrilled at the idea in the beginning ("Oh great. That's what we really need, mum. Another girl in the house.") Farah was super busy getting involved in various activities that the school planned for the exchange students and now playing catch-up with the school work that she missed the entire week, last week. Fun times ahead, no doubt.
I am also sad to say that while I do not have an affinity with D/isney Channel merchandise, those were the glue that bound the two teenage girls in my house.
Just before the student left our house, Sara had already poured her heart out to her. She has proclaimed that the student will forever be her best friend. And drew many cards and hearts that she expected the student will bring home with her. The connection was not one-sided either.
The student asked my permission if she could bring Sara home, seeing that the student is an only child and by now realised that having an adoring younger sister is definitely a good thing. I told her she could do so, if Sara could fit into her luggage. I heard Sara actually tried to squeeze into it, but decided against it since the luggage would need to be zipped and locked up. She doesn't like to be in the dark.
The two girls (Farah and the student) will meet again in November for when my girl will go to Bangkok to stay with another family. So it's not really goodbye for them, just a see-you-later.
I am also sad to say that while I do not have an affinity with D/isney Channel merchandise, those were the glue that bound the two teenage girls in my house.
Just before the student left our house, Sara had already poured her heart out to her. She has proclaimed that the student will forever be her best friend. And drew many cards and hearts that she expected the student will bring home with her. The connection was not one-sided either.
The student asked my permission if she could bring Sara home, seeing that the student is an only child and by now realised that having an adoring younger sister is definitely a good thing. I told her she could do so, if Sara could fit into her luggage. I heard Sara actually tried to squeeze into it, but decided against it since the luggage would need to be zipped and locked up. She doesn't like to be in the dark.
The two girls (Farah and the student) will meet again in November for when my girl will go to Bangkok to stay with another family. So it's not really goodbye for them, just a see-you-later.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Pfffftt!
So on Earth Hour on Saturday, we turned out the lights and huddled over the small TV in my room. We had a candle burning in the room, and the helper had her own candle in her room and had the small battery-powered transistor radio turned on for her own entertainment.
Whoever who had to go to the loo had the option of bringing the candle into the loo or had to do it in the dark. And because the fan was turned off, whoever had to do number two, had to do it at the toilet outside of the room we were in, thankyou. In the end, everyone held off and there was a queue by the time 9.30pm was upon us.
At the 30 minute mark, Farah started to wonder if our neighbours and neighbourhood were taking part in Earth Hour. We all walked gingerly to the kitchen, looked out and up our window kitchen (we are on the second floor) and much to our disappointment, lights galore in the other apartments. So we speculated as to why people were not observing the hour as we were. Sara thinks it's probably because their teachers didn't remind them about Earth Hour before school ended on Friday evening. The rest of us adults and near-adults dismissed it as apathy. And decided apathy was bad.
Whoever who had to go to the loo had the option of bringing the candle into the loo or had to do it in the dark. And because the fan was turned off, whoever had to do number two, had to do it at the toilet outside of the room we were in, thankyou. In the end, everyone held off and there was a queue by the time 9.30pm was upon us.
At the 30 minute mark, Farah started to wonder if our neighbours and neighbourhood were taking part in Earth Hour. We all walked gingerly to the kitchen, looked out and up our window kitchen (we are on the second floor) and much to our disappointment, lights galore in the other apartments. So we speculated as to why people were not observing the hour as we were. Sara thinks it's probably because their teachers didn't remind them about Earth Hour before school ended on Friday evening. The rest of us adults and near-adults dismissed it as apathy. And decided apathy was bad.
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