Mumsy Musings

A new year, a new wish

2011-01-07T10:10:00.004+08:00

I know that I have been neglecting this blog and it's really because I have a) not much to write about and b) not much time to write. And so I think it is time for me to bid you farewell. I started this blog to share my ride as a mum, juggling 3 kids (no, not literally juggling them all in mid air although at times the ride was tough it felt like it was), work and running a household.

My baby is now 8 years old and is now in primary 3. She was a slow-starter and I had many sleepless nights worrying about her but she's showing signs of catching up and hopefully she'll be able to shine as brightly as I know she could.

My son turned 11 last year and will be sitting for the all-important PSLE papers this year. He knows how important this year will be but he inherited the husband's mischievious trait to be too consumed with the stress of studying.

My eldest is turning 16. Sixteen. Sheesh. Learning quickly about relationship, responsibility and possibly heartache in the process. I'm so glad I'm not a teenager anymore. She'll be sitting for a couple of her O level papers this year and the rest next year. I had sleepness nights worrying about her, too. She joined our family just before entering primary 1. And at primary 1 she wasn't able to recognise the alphabets, let alone read. And she didn't speak English. I think about how far she's come and I give thanks to the Almighty for giving her - and my other kids - resilience.

At the right time, as I promised when I first started this blog, I will let my kids read my blog - they don't know of its existence right now. And I hope they will enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing.

And with that, dear readers, I want to thank you for staying with me on this ride. And I wish for you peace, happiness and success for 2011 and may you and yours be blessed with many more years ahead.

xx Dramamama

If I was being totally honest...

2010-12-15T09:42:00.005+08:00

...I would say that I am getting bored and maybe even frustrated with my job. I find that I am busy but with things that I am describing as "mundane" and "boring". I am starting to feel like I am working in a sausage factory...endless amounts of the same ol' same ol'. And even though the job market is picking up and I am getting many calls, I haven't been able to nail any of the ones that I was interested in. Mostly, I've been told my experience is too "senior" for the role.

So I was bummed out for a couple of weeks. The husband said I need to start either making my current job more exciting or be patient for "the" job that might interest me. Good advice, I must say.

So I turned to The One for some solace as I just wanted to feel less "stuck" and more "happy". All in quote marks because I have a feeling that these are my perceptions which are projecting as reality to me and I really need divine intervention to show me the way. And He never fails me.

A couple of days later, I started sketching in my head, what I would do to make my current role more interesting. I had some ideas and thoughts but didn't quite have the courage to present it to my direct boss. I was bound by my own fears; what if she said this is the job, take it or leave it. Or if she said something worse like, you're fired!? So while I had some ideas, I wasn't sure how I was going to express them without seeming like I didn't want my job anymore.

However, the opportunity presented itself in one of my weekly calls with her (my boss is based outside of Singapore). We were talking about 2011 plans and I started presenting the ideas I had in my head slightly differently. The new stuff I wanted to do, I related it back to how it would help the business. After 20+ years of communications experience, I was slapping my forehead for forgetting this really simple and basic rule of communications - tell them what's in it for them. Sigh. She was thankfully, very happy to hear my ideas and we discussed what the next steps are.

So in the end, I have stopped looking for greener pastures. I am instead focusing on how I am making what I have better -for me and the business I work for.

Alhamdulillah :)

I am beginning to like TedEx...by a lot

2010-12-10T18:23:00.000+08:00

Check this out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7yaDlZfqrc

Food for thought 2:

2010-11-25T13:31:00.000+08:00

Jamie Oliver's TED Prize wish: Teach every child about food Video on TED.com

A breakthrough

2010-11-15T19:06:00.002+08:00

My family and I are touchy-feely people. We like to give each other hugs and kisses and we say "I love you" to each other all the time. I say "I love you" to all three kids on different occasions and usually I get the two younger ones reciprocating by saying "I love you too, mummy moo." Farah usually says "Oh OK," as a reply. I never pushed the issue, never asked her why she doesn't reply the way I think (or rather, hope) she would reply. I used to get annoyed and even irritated that she is stingy with her expressions of love and affection to the people who love her dearly. But I also know I have to be patient and when she's ready, she will. And last night, before I drove off to the airport to catch a plane to Sydney, she was ready.

The husband was away too and I told her I depend on her to make sure the two kiddies do not drive the helper round the bend and stress Atok and Nenek too much with their antics. She said OK. I hugged and kissed her and said "Love you, Kak." I thought I heard her mumble something but she looked away and moved off before I could ask her.

Tonight I called the kids from Sydney. Everything sounds like they are under control. So I ended my chats with each child with a "I love you and see you tomorrow". And tonight, I was rewarded with a "Love you too, mummy." Loud and clear. From Farah. The daughter I have had to try harder to win over. Alhamdulillah :')

Bullied

2010-10-18T14:04:00.006+08:00

There's been so much news from the US on bullying recently that caused these bullied kids to take their own life. It's scary how evil some kids could be.

Until recently, Sara was a target for a bully in her class. I didn't think much about Sara's complaining of a certain classmate who took liberties with deciding when they were friends and when they're not. Usually that classmate decision is based on who will do what for her. Interestingly, that classmate was then given some responsibilities which included writing down names of misbehaving students and reporting them to their teacher. And as it turns out, the days when Sara (and others in the class) who were deemed as not being her friend, these kids get reported to the discipline teacher as being "naughty" and "misbehaved".

It reached to a point where Sara started crying her eyes out about going to school. In the beginning, the husband and I thought she was just finding an excuse not to go to school because she had forgotten a homework or whatever. She's never actually told us why she'd refuse to go to school on some days. We also started noticing that she was asking for extra pocket money and when not given, made it a point to make sure she brought a sandwich to school.

So, this mother finally sat up and took notice when, in one of her crying fits refusing to go to school, Sara finally told me about this particular girl in her class who have been rotating between telling other classmates to ostracise Sara when she refused to do something bully girl wanted, to reporting Sara for something she didn't do to getting her lunch money taken away from her.

It was intervention time and I brought her to school and asked to see the class teacher. The teacher was so surprised to hear about the reasons that have led to the crying fits and promised to keep a closer eye on the two girls (yeah, the bully's a girl) and will also inform the bully's mum - who just happened to be a teacher in the same school who - guess what - is the discipline teacher.

Things seemed to improved for Sara after the chat I had with her class teacher. Sara is keeping her distance from the bully and apparently, other kids have now also come up to the class teacher to tell her the terror that reigned.

And if you thought the story ended there...guess again. While the bullying in school has stopped, it continued on facebook. OK, disclaimer - Sara has a facebook account but mostly to indulge in some harmless game and I do monitor her page closely. She only has access to it on school holidays.

So, getting back to the story, the bully starting leaving hate messages on Sara's facebook wall, such as "I hate you" etc. Because I wanted to empower Sara to learn to fight this bully directly, I've asked Sara to report back to the teacher and then remove this girl from her friend list. So it looks like that worked.

I still don't know how and why a kid could behave the way Sara's class bully behaved. It would be interesting to find out.

Mammo schwammo

2010-09-20T18:14:00.005+08:00

The beauty of coming reaally close to 40, I'm experiencing, is being subjected to various health examinations such as the mammogram. After a routine check up my gynae said I needed to go for my first mammogram. Since I would save $200 by going to a public instead of private clinic, the choice is a no-brainer. Fast forward to three months later, I made an appointment at a public clinic and was told to set aside 3-4 hours for this test. Right. I took half-day leave from work to ensure I have enough time.

I was pleasantly surprised that I was attended to right at the time of my appointment. And that was basically the best bit of my appointment - they saw me on time (and actually I stayed for less than hour which left me plenty of time to roam around aimlessly). The rest of the time I spent at the diagnostics clinic, I felt like my two girlfriends - Boob Right and Boob Left - were tortured and treated like pieces of meat. I was made to contort into positions that tested the flexibility of my limbs (thank you, yoga) and was asked if I could turn and twist my head a full 180 degrees. I had to turn my body to one side while ensuring my by-now separate pieces of flesh are left on a tray, manhandled and contorted by a radiologist who is very apologetic about it all. And I had to do a re-take because take # 5 couldn't be used. Joy.

I think the folks at GE need to relook at the design of their sonograph equipment. Honestly folks, why would you expect the patients to contort their bodies and bodily parts to suit the design of your machines? You should design your machines to suit the patients lah. And we are talking about 40 year old ladies here who might not be all nimble and patient. And while most of us have gone through child labour, it doesn't mean we would want to subject ourselves to the same pain in a different part of our body. *glare*

Boob Left and Boob Right are slowly getting over the manhandling but man, this experience has left a lasting impression on them and I. Jeez, I am turning into a grumpy old lady.

Too little time

2010-09-06T16:52:00.003+08:00

...but too much to say. This Ramadhan has been quite eventful. I lost a dear aunt two weeks ago. We were on our way to visit my aunt in the hospital when we got a call that she passed away right after Isha'. My mum is still grieving the loss of her elder sister and I just don't know how to comfort her.

I joined forces with family members to help save a marriage that was on the rocks. Insha Allah, it helped the couple to see the situation more clearly and be more mindful of how their words and actions can hurt each other. That was such an eye-opener because as I listened to the other family members speak, I realise there is a lot of lessons there that I could learn, too.

As Ramadhan is making its exit, I can't be thankful enough for the opportunity to experience it again and pray that I will be given another chance next year, insha Allah.

With that, I pray that our fasts and ibadah are accepted and Eid Mubarak to you and yours.

Truly, He knows...

2010-08-16T20:29:00.002+08:00

...what's in our hearts. I was just quietly lamenting the fact that I haven't been reading the Qur'an as much as I'd like to. And tonight, I pulled Yusof Ali's translated Qur'an and randomly pulled a surah to read. I was struck as I was finishing reading surah Al-Muzammil...

"...He hath turned to you (in mercy): read ye, therefore, of the Qur'an as much as may be easy for you. He knoweth that there may be (some) among you in ill-health; others travelling through the land, seeking of Allah's bounty; yet others fighting in Allah's Cause, read ye, therefore, as much of the Qur'an as may be easy (for you); and establish regular Prayer and give regular Charity; and loan to Allah a Beautiful Loan. And whatever good ye send forth for your souls ye shall find it in Allah's Presence,- yea, better and greater, in Reward and seek ye the Grace of Allah. for Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."

I can't even begin to tell you how that surah made me feel :'(

Quick update

2010-08-11T11:19:00.003+08:00

Just coming up for air now and wanted to very quickly wish Ramadhan Kareem to all. I'm hoping there will be less distractions for me this year. Last year we MOVED house and all sense of calm went out the door. I know, I shouldn't complain and in the spirit of Ramadhan, I'll stop there.

I've been very organised this year...the girls', my helper, my parents and I have all got our Eid clothes (hurray!). The only two who haven't are the husband and Danial. We bought ours in Melaka before Ramadhan because these are way cheaper there and we didn't want to have to shop when fasting. So I kinda feel sorry for the husband and Danial for not being able to pick theirs (lack of size and design and colour) and wish them well as they'll have to wade through the crowd and heat in Geylang or someplace to get theirs. I ain't going nowhere near anywhere crowded especially when fasting, thankyouverymuch.

And all the cookies have been ordered, although my mother and helper are hell-bent on baking some cookies at home. They think the smell of freshly baked cookies is part of the anticipation of Eid. I told them I am happy to sponsor the ingredients and be the main taste tester but I ain't slogging in front of the oven at night.

The husband unfortunately still has a couple of work trips he has to be on which couldn't be rescheduled. I, on the other hand, am a maverick as I've been able to manouvre my way to ensure all my trips are happening after Eid. I know. I am good *looks away in amazement*.

Sara is starting half day fasts and has said she'd want to attempt full day fasts on the weekend. Hurray! The other two kids are at the stage where they just do it; no fuss no drama. Iftar will be simple although we might go a little overboard on weekends when the kids have the privilege of making a request each. We'll see how that goes.

I on the other hand, besides wanting all the good spiritual things from Ramadhan, want to lose some weight and am keeping an eye on the weighing scale along with food intake and some exercise.

So anyway, Ramadhan Kareem everyone and may our fasts be accepted.

I'm almost afraid to say this...

2010-07-27T10:19:00.002+08:00

...but I see some of me in this hilarious video.

Mom Song - Celebrity bloopers here

The experience

2010-07-22T11:24:00.005+08:00

I had my first ever volunteer gig two weeks ago by going over to the family center for the first time. At first look, the center looks like any after-school care center. The only difference is the kids in that particular center are underprivileged. Some do not have parental care - their parents are either in jail, rehab or just not there. Some have parents who have to work all day and night and that leave the kids with an empty home to return to.

I was very nervous attending. Not least because I was late as I couldn't find the center. I didn't know what to expect. I was certainly not expecting the kids to gather round me and chatting amongst themselves, trying to figure out what language I spoke or what race I was. It became quite funny when I started introducing myself and a couple of hands were raised to get help for homework. However, my first assignment was to help a P2 boy with his Malay homework by virtue of the fact that the other volunteers couldn't help him with that homework.

The one-page assignment took longer than I anticipated...that little boy could hardly recognise the alphabet, let alone read. Sigh. I wanted to teach the boy some phonics, I cajoled him into making the sounds of the letters that were in front of him. He left the table after every 10 minutes because he lost interest. Each time, I had to call him back to the desk and reminded him he needed to complete his homework or else he wouldn't be allowed to join the other activities.

Once that homework is done, the boy quickly shoved the worksheet in his bag and ran off to another group who was playing a boardgame. I didn't realise this but I had a little girl who had been patiently waiting for me to finish with the homework. She had a book in hand and had wanted me to read the book to her.

She took my hand and led me to the reading corner and sat down next to me. We read a book about a spotty bunny how this bunny was very different from his siblings who were all white and had pink eyes. While reading, I asked her a couple of questions about the story to see if she was listening and she was. I tried asking her to read a couple of lines, but she just kept silent and pointed me back to the book. I only learned her name at the end of my 3 hour visit there. She asked me if I was coming back soon to read to her again.

I think I will.

Iqra'!*

2010-07-09T08:07:00.006+08:00

I used to read almost a book a week pre-kids era. Work was hectic then but the evenings was when I would cradle a book in my hands, ferociously going through each word and inquiring the story, character, plot and sometimes, even trying to second guess and question the author's intentions. When the kids entered my world, I was happy to cradle them instead in my arms. And now, since the kids are too big for my arms, I am back to cradling books. Circle of life in action here, people.

In the six months or so, I have completed reading The Audacity of Hope by Barack Obama and Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson and David Relin. And I must say, both books are equally inspiring.

As both books show, education is the key to success. Sounds like a no-brainer but in far flung and war-torn places in Pakistan and Afghanistan, it is quite a feat. I am inspired by Greg Mortenson's simple philosophy - he wants to make a difference in the world by educating children, especially girls. He broke many stereotypes in his book - of mullahs, mujahideen and of Islam, especially. Through humanity, he shows that we are all not that different - every parent has a big dream for their children that are only stifled by the environment they live in. Some want to send their kids to school but there are either no schools or they can't afford to. Greg's mission is to build secular schools that are free. The villagers come together to build those schools together with funding from Greg's non-profit organization.

Obama's unique childhood and his quest for knowledge to better the community he is in, is inspiring. The efforts his late mother made to ensure he is not sidelined in education because of his colour, is touching.

What the two biographies really demonstrate is the important need for education to level the playing field. It is a no-brainer but it is unbelievable that there are children in this century who still has no access to schools and teachers or in this little island, children who can't or won't go to school because of the environment they are in.

And so, to walk the talk, I have volunteered myself in a literacy programme which kicks off in a couple of days. I will be working with a group of underprivileged kids to encourage them to read. I'm a little bit nervous and excited at the same time. Wish me luck as I take baby steps into this new venture.

*"Iqra" was the first commandment from Allah the Almighty to Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). The word means "Read" in Arabic.

A (hardly) funny story

2010-06-29T10:26:00.005+08:00

So leading up to June 25, I was getting pensive. The husband clearly didn't remember that special date. He went about his busy routine with nary an acknowledgement. And I guess, after 15 years, you forget.

A day before that date, I pulled myself together, made my way to the mall to buy him a present and brought the kids along as they were on the tail end of their school holidays. They wanted to know why we were buying a present and I told them it's for our wedding anniversary. Then they wanted to know what their daddy was buying me and I said, well, I don't know and even if he didn't it would be OK because I don't expect anything back from giving this gift. My verbalised self-righteousness was lost on the kids as they went "really?" and quickly helped me choose a gift.

All this time, I was telling myself, give a gift because you want to and it would please God, not because you want something back. I repeated that mantra all the way home. June 24 night, he said nothing. I tried to fight back tears.

As I woke up for fajar the next day, I left my gift on his beside table and went about my routine. I came back to the room and saw the gift gone from his table. He came out of the shower and said "Hey, thanks for the present!", a wide grin across his face. I gave him a glare and said "You're most welcome." He got confused and asked, "What's the occasion?"

I had to control myself from crying and in my most caustic tone said, "Oh, nothing. Just that it's our 15th anniversary. No biggie, really."

Him: "Huh? But it's not today, sayang. You forgot our wedding date?"

I couldn't believe he not only forgot our wedding anniversary, he is now saying I am WRONG? The cheek he has!

Me: "I didn't forget, you did. And now you are trying to shift the blame on me."

Him: "I know I'm right. Let's check right now. That drawer, the marriage certificate is in that drawer."

Me: "Yes I know where it is because I put it there, thankyouverymuch."

I made my way to the drawer, indignant that I had to prove the very date he promised to love and care for me for the rest of his life. I looked at the certificate and said, "See?? It says June 29! Oh."

Him: "And today's June 25."

Me: "Oh. Hmm. OK but we've been married for 15 years and you were going to forget that fact, too."

Him: "No, we'd be married for 14 years by then."

As I was doing the mental math with me eyes probably darting left to right in a systematic fashion, the husband counted the number of years on his fingers and used mine for the additional four fingers he needed. I hate being wrong.

But I love being married for 14 years on June 25, I mean June 29.

Of cavities and swollen cheek

2010-06-28T15:14:00.003+08:00

Prior to our week-long holiday in Melaka and Kuala Lumpur, the kids knew they had a visit to the dentist when we came back. Except for Farah, who was with her school drama club in an exchange programme in Adelaide. Can I just quickly digress that I am *amazed* at these so-called school trips. When I was in school, the furthest we went was Melaka and that was a treat. These days, schools take kids to ALL OVER the world. I know kids who went to New Zealand, Portugal and China with their school. Schools must be the next big target for travel agencies! We paid close to $2K for Farah's trip and she was going to stay with a family for 5 days and in a 3 star motel for only 2 days. The husband thinks its a rip-off but we couldn't quite get another travel agency to provide us with a cheaper quote, could we?

Anyway, back to the story. So the other two kids had the dentist look at their little pearlies. Sara went first and I thought it would be a breeze. The kid has white baby teeth brushes religiously. But no. She had two cavities - each on the left and right molar. One had a broken filling and another which was close to the nerves and would require a root canal. The thing about kid-friendly dentist is they distract the kids with a huge screen that can play any movie on-demand and for Sara, she gets a funky looking heart-shaped sunglasses as well to wear. She was happy with Barbie playing on the big screen and didn't know what the dentist was saying to me. I said no to the root canal, I said we'll leave that for another time. In fact, I suggested extraction instead but the dentist did warn me it could create alignment problems later on and I acknowledged that but sheesh, a root canal for a 7-year old was too cruel I thought. So, the dentist went on to fill the other cavity only to find that they need to clean the cavity and it was close to a nerve too. By that time, I was feeling rather cold and faint while Sara still had NO idea.

To cut a long story short, the topical anesthesia didn't work. A couple of screams and Noooos later, she was injected twice to block the nerves completely. Sara was crying and I was almost lying on the dentist chair next to Sara to calm her down. But a super trooper that she was, she held on to me and stayed on until the entire procedure was done.

When we left the dentist, she still couldn't feel her cheeks and as a result kept biting into her lips and cheeks that she's now ended up with a swollen lip and cheek. She's now frighten of dentists and I'm not quite sure how I'm going to get her to return to extract that other molar. Hmmm.

Danial had it easy. His adult teeth were cleaned and polished and he's thinking his now-sparkling smile will quite blind us. I should've asked for the heart-shaped sunglasses to bring home.

PS: Do you like my new template?? After five-plus years, I think this blog could do with a refreshed look, don't you think?

Where's the karate?

2010-06-14T21:26:00.003+08:00

We brought the kids to watch The Karate Kid movie - along with the Bhutias who came to visit us. All five kids were dying to watch Jaden Smith and the husband and Mr Bhutia are a long-time fans of Jackie Chan. Mrs Bhutia and I were outnumbered and we simply followed the crowd.

So considering it was Sat night and the movie was apparently popular, most of the cineplexes were sold out but the kids were in luck and we ended up in a nearby cineplex where we could get decent seats for all nine of us. So while I was watching the movie (way past my bedtime) I couldn't help but think if Jackie would make a good Mr Miyagi.

Then it occured to me. While the "earlier" Karate Kid movies were on karate, this movie is all about KUNG-FU set in China. Talk about a deceiving title. Buyers beware!

The kids thought the movie was hugely entertaining. The two daddies were quite pleased with the kung-fu action. I was being a cranky old lady and was mildly entertained. The popcorn was good though.

Maid-to-order

2010-06-09T11:08:00.004+08:00

I never knew disciplining a kid could make me laugh-out-loud. No, I am not being sadistic and no feelings were hurt, except for Sara's. But I think she will laugh about this when she's older too.

Our story starts with Sara doing her homework in my room. I was working from home and was keeping an eye on the work she was doing while reading and reporting on a report - I know, reporting on a report sounds silly but it's part of what I need to do for work. Anyhow, Sara went from sitting next to me, to sprawling on the floor to climbing into my bed. The result of that trail is a mess that covered most part of my room. So I had to then supervise her to clean the room.

Cleaning up includes removing the eraser bits that were all over the floor with a small broom, to putting my pillows back properly on my bed to throwing out used papers. After two sets of instructions the little girl was getting moody. She started to stomp her feet and glare at me. When I asked her what's wrong, what came out of her mouth was nothing short of amazement. She said, "Why do you treat me like a maid?!" My immediate reaction was a guffaw which was not appreciated because she stomped out of my room cyring and I later heard her complaining to my mother.

After a few minutes, I went to her room and tried to explain to her why she had to clean up. Her defence was since it was my room which was messy, then I have to clean up because it was MY room. This is because she has to clean her own room and she's never asked me to clean HER room. Of course the fact that she messed my room up is immaterial at this stage. So in the end, she did finish cleaning up the mess, albeit grudgingly.

That evening, I was tucking her in and saw a piece of paper in her room and saw her scribblings on it. I picked it up and all was revealed:

"My mother trits me like a maid! She said I must clean up her room. It is HER room and I have to clean it up?! She is so bossy! My bibik is not even trited like a mid but I am. And the worse part? She didn't even say thank you! And that is so rud. And she always remind me to say thank you! I am so angry."

Kid, you have no idea how cute you are.

Well hellooo there

2010-06-02T13:26:00.003+08:00

This blog is in need of resuscitation. The diagnosis is severe; persistent neglect. Why have gone MIA? That's a loaded question my friend. And I would answer it in parts. Some parts being too distracted by real life, most parts just plain lazy. Poor excuse I know, but hey.

So, since the last post I had, many many things have happened.

Sara seemed to have turn the corner as far as her math grades go. The school she is currently attending only tests kids at mid year and final year. Lots of Kum/on, tuition and practice hours later, she emerged with a 70% pass for her math midyear exams. My little super trooper was thrilled beyond words and this dramamama was moved to tears. She is even more enthused with practising and studying now more than ever, alhamdulillah. She's been begging to join a ballet class. We relented and I can see she's quite enjoying it (even though the husband is not too keen on seeing his little girl in leotards and a see through skirt).

The other two kiddies also turned in results which marked improvements from the first term results but they both know they could achieve much more.

And speaking of achievement, we enrolled Danial into a camp this June holidays. It's costing us a lot of money but we do hope that this camp can help jump start the boy into being self-motivated and help him realise his full potential. Today is Day 3 of the camp and he seemed to quite enjoy the experience.

Farah did well enough for us to agree to her joining a school trip to Adelaide at the end of the month. She knows she is capable of getting better grades and so we have set out goals for her to achieve for her finals. I must say I am thankful that we are not going through severe bouts of teenage angsts and mood swings.

As for the husband, he is still travelling for work. Aiming to run a marathon towards the end of the year. Took up cycling with a couple of other friends and enjoying his bike rides that start at 6am and cycling for tens of kms each weekend. Insanity to others, thrilling to some.

Yours truly do miss blogging. Thoughts of closing this blog down have crossed my mind especially since I started this blog to talk about my kids when they were younger. Now, they are much older and well, our lives are getting a bit more routine to blog about. So I am thinking of changing the course of this blog. I might stay here or start another blog...not sure yet. But whatever it is, I will be sure to let you know.

Attention!

2010-04-13T17:11:00.004+08:00

I was that startled when he mentioned he hasn't seen the pair of shoes before (which I bought a couple of weeks ago and was going to put them on this morning). Or that he noticed there was a new top I had in my wardrobe. What next?? Oh this is too much for my heart!

Mawlid

2010-04-05T16:17:00.002+08:00

The Mawlid season is wrapping up and my mum, to coincide with inviting her masjid friends over to her new residence, invited her friends over to commemorate Mawlid with berzanji and nasheed. So we had about 20 ladies over on a wet Saturday afternoon; much to my mum's delight (and relief), almost all of her friends came over, braving the heavy rain.

Since it was an all-ladies event, my dad and the husband parked themselves nicely at the first floor. We also invited some relatives over and the two men of the house made the most of the situation by putting hosting skills to good use by mostly saying hello and pointing to where the food and drinks are...just kidding.

The berzanji session was beautiful. I was amazed that these ladies have such beautiful voices that they are putting to good use to praise the Almighty Allah. At the end of the 45minute session, I was moved with all the selawat and berzanji that my eyes weren't dry at the end of the entire session. I looked around and saw a number of other ladies dabbing their eyes as well.

It was certainly a nice sight to see my mum with her friends - some of whom I knew since I was a little girl. Some friends you want to keep and some friendships just last a lifetime.

Contagious

2010-03-27T15:28:00.002+08:00

Just when I thought that my son is the only one in the family with a bad case of cornyjokelitis, I discoverd to my horror that the condition might be contagious and the latest victiom is the littlest girl in the house. And it's looking worse than I could ever imagine.

Her: Mummy, why can't the zebra cross the road?
Here we go...
Me: Because there is no zebra crossing?
Her: Good try, but no.
Me: OK, tell me the answer?
Her: Because the zebra could not bring herself to step on another zebra who's crossing the road because that other zebra is actually a zebra crossing. Geddit mummy, geddit?
And in her gentlest voice, out came a shocking BWAHAHAHA.

Sigh.

Corny lives here

2010-03-22T09:50:00.000+08:00

My son, has the potential to be one of Jay Leno's writers when he grows up. He just needs a lot of time polishing his talent and soon, he'll be ready. I think. In the meantime, here are some of jokes he regaled us with.

What starts with "T", ends with "T" and is filled with "T"?
(After every riddle, he asks, "Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Tea-pot!!
(And each time he gives you the answer, it has to be followed by a huge BWA-HAHAHA, and usually it's just his and the husband's)

What do you call a mouse who's just had a shower?
("Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Squeaky clean!
(BWA-HAHAHA)

How do you make a tissue paper dance?
("Give up? Sure you want to give up?")
Put some booger in it!
(BWA-HAHAHA)

Bring it up a notch, please

2010-03-12T11:37:00.003+08:00

OK, so if you don't like or don't watch American Idol, you may safely skip this post.

My gripe about this new season is - why is it that everyone on the show sing slow songs and playing the guitar? OK not, everyone but almost. Like, where is the spunk? Where is the entertainment? They might as well call this season American Snoozer.

There's one girl who plays the digital piano but she was so unoriginal she was mauled by the judges. And this is in addition to MY arm-chair critique of her. Fail. She will so be going home.

And what is going on with Kara and Simon? Can we please cut out the sideshow and just focus on the kids?

Dudes, please step on it and make this season an interesting watch.

PS: As you can tell, I take this show very seriously. Don't laugh.

The birds and the whaaat??

2010-02-25T15:44:00.008+08:00

I cannot believe this is the time. This week alone (and this week is not even DONE yet) I have had two kids come to me to ask me about the birds and the, yes.

First off, a cranky Farah rolled herself to my room one night. Eyes squinting. Body slouched. As she approached me, she slouched even more, and dramatically threw herself on my bed. She closed her eyes as she muttered the words that shocked me.

"Mummy, please do not sign me up for any more sex education class. I want to opt out the next one. PLEEAASE!," she pleaded. Of course such theatrics should be matched with more theatrics and so turned my head and said, "Huh, what? You had sex ed? Today? In school I hope!"

"YES, I did and that's because you said I should attend. It was disgusting. They showed us all how to put a c/ond/om over a banana! Like, YUCK! It's GROSS!" And as she was rolling in MY bed, ruffling up my clean and tightly pulled bedsheet, she pleaded with more gusto about getting out of the next one. Which will be held, get this. Next year. I'm all for future planning so I gave her a break and told her OK, I will opt her out.

The second chapter to this story starts with me and Danial at the supermarket. We were getting ready for a barbeque that night and I was buying stuff to you know, barbeque.

As we were waiting in line to pay for our groceries, I saw Danial eyeing the candy just before we got to the cash register. I was ready to tell him no to chocolates or sweets.

Him: Why are c/o/nd/oms so expensive?

Me: No sweets or chocolates before dinner. We are having a barbeque tonight and your uncle is making creme bru...huh? What did you say??

Him: Co/nd/oms. Why are they expensive?

There's me, looking at the sweets and chocolates that are lined up nicely and just above them, there they were. Multiple types with a variety of colours and flavours.

Me: Er, I don't know why they cost that much. But, wait what do you know about them? Who taught you?

Him: I first thought they were sweets and I asked *elder cousin boy A* if those tastes good. And he laughed at me saying those are not sweets. He told me what these are called.

Me: What else did he tell you? At this point, I started to notice a young mother who was behind me listening to our conversation and the elderly man in front of us, grinning. Why? I don't know...

Him: Nothing. He told me what it's for. It just sounds gross.

Because I am a glutton for punishment, I had to ask

Me: What is it for?

Him: For men to wear over his ...

Me: Okay fine, you know what it's for. Just so you know, you are too young to think about...

Him: Mummy, I just told you it's gross. I don't know why adults do what they do to make babies.

At that point, I think the boy has heard enough (I know I had) and decided to let the matter rest by asking him to help me carry some of the groceries.

Next time anyone asks me, I'll tell them to speak to their father! That or distract them with some candy.

Things people say...

2010-02-03T16:24:00.003+08:00

...at work and meetings.

I present to you a collection of the wonderful business wisdom that I personally have heard, overheard or read.

- We need to be vigilante.
- It is a challenge of the challenging situation
- We do not take the eye of the ball.
- Who knows who will win?
- Growth and succeed do not come easy.
- Internalise what I said before you ask any questions.
- We need to create a greater than great plan.
- Collaboration, not uncollaboration is key.

Feel free to jump in with your own favourites.

Hmmm

2010-02-01T16:12:00.002+08:00

Besides stating the obvious such as "What? It's February ALREADY?" or "I haven't updated this blog for how long now?" I feel like I've been sucked into what some would call "daily routine" and have had no time for anything else.

If I hadn't said it before, Sara is quite enjoying her new school. She did make me nervous by saying her teachers are "grumpy" and "yell a lot" and I thought, oh no...she's going to ask to go back to her old school. Or when she came home and asked me what the words "chewren" and "tarme" mean because she heard some teachers used them and I thought, oh no...I will have to send her back to her old school.

While that child is nicely adapting to her new routine, I had a naughty little boy who misbehaved. We found out Danial has been nicely going to school with his school t-shirt everyday when students are only allowed to be in t-shirt on PE days. His logic when we asked why he'd done that? Was simply, the weather is too hot to be wearing collared shirt and he didn't like being all sweaty and hot. But rules, they are meant to be obeyed so we told him no-go but made a deal that he could change into his t-shirt when he walks to my SIL's after school.

We also caught him covertly playing computer games when he's not supposed to and skipping homework. I was floored; what happened to the sweet little boy I used to know? So in the end, his CPU is now sitting nicely in my room and the husband and I check his school bag daily to ensure he's done what he needs to do.

Besides all these drama, both Sara and Danial have one thing in common. They both want to quit Kumon. Whines such as the worksheets are too difficult and there isn't enough time to complete the worksheets where met with rational counter reasons. I know I sound like a crazy mum, but the worksheets only take less than half hour to complete and they have enough time for TV, ride their bicycles and read daily. They are resisting the discipline that is needed to complete the worksheets and that is the one thing that will help them succeed in life. Talent without discipline amounts to nothing, I told them with my sage hat firmly on my head.

Danial is still being observed. He'll need to earn our trust to be able to get his little luxuries back. And he knows that too. While Farah didn't have too bad of a teenage rebellion, I half suspect this time around, the teenage typhoon will hit us harder with this little boy. Sigh.

Life's reminder

2010-01-11T15:10:00.002+08:00

An old and dear friend, whose house I used to frequent when we had school projects to complete or when we just wanted to take refuge in her air conditioned and cozy bedroom away from the hot and humid weather, the same room which kept us away from her two elder pesky brothers, just told me her dad had been diagnosed with cancer. A detailed scan revealed more tumours and the prognosis is bleak.

She's being pulled in many directions at the moment. She works full time, her husband is away most days of the month due to the nature of his job, she has a son to care for and she is now her mum's and dad's emotional crutch during this trying time.

I can't even begin to imagine her exhaustion, both physical and mental exhaustion, that she is going through right now. I can only offer her a prayer that she is given strength and faith to go through and overcome this trial.

And may I also request that you send through your du'a or best thoughts to my father-in-law who is also going through some health issues as well. May he recover quickly and always remember to take his medications regularly. And may the Almighty keeps all of us safe and healthy as we begin the new decade. Ameen.

Of origin and extracts

2010-01-07T14:33:00.004+08:00

Happy 2010! I know I'm late but hey, better than never :)

I've gone all quiet for a while because real life took over... the helper went on home leave, my parents moved in, the kids needed to be reminded that school's starting and getting them back into gear was quite a feat. All the habits they acquired during the school break - waking up later, doing minimal studying and playing all day - needed to be dumped, and unfortunately not without tears and resistance.

With mum and dad living with us now, meal times are taking a whole new dimension. The kids are eating better because they can't say no to mum's cooking. And neither could I nor the husband. And we really can do without the extra calories but we succumb anyway and in between mouthfuls, we talk about our very brittle self control. And the cycle continues, the more we eat, the more mum cooks. Not sure if we would describe the cycle as vicious, maybe deliciously vicious?

Sara goes to a new school. She loves loves loves her pinafore because Farah also wears a pinafore to school so that puts Sara into the big girls' league. She loves loves loves taking the school bus. And she is loving her new classmates and teachers whom she's described as pretty. Alhamdulillah as I let out a huge *phew*!

As I was going through the paperwork to get her transfered to a new school, I have had to fill out quite a few forms and I learnt, at least in the school system, there is now something called "Indon extract" in the "Race" column. Since Singapore is still hung up over classifying people based on race, I had a good chuckle because I was no longer identified as "Javanese" in the system, but rather as an "Indon extract". Is this called clarity in ambiguity? No, I didn't think so too.

I wait for the day when my children would come across this "race" and will ask if Indon extract is the same as beef extract.

Easy does it

2009-12-16T10:42:00.002+08:00

The revisions with Sara are going well, alhamdulillah. We are now going into chapter two of Pri 2 maths topic. She's gaining some confidence and I am thrilled to bits.

JDsg, you would be pleased to know that I took your advice to heart and she has been taught one way of solving a particular maths problem and that seemed to clear LOTS of confusion. Jazakallah for the tip!

Sara also received compliments from her ustazah during her Iqra' lessons. She wasn't reading well and was dragging her feet during Iqra so when she did read well, the ustazah took advantage of it and praised her in front of the other kids and that pleased Sara very much. Pleased me, too :)

So it seems we have achieved some success with her. She is looking forward to going to her new school, in her new uniform and riding that school bus. What is the attraction with school bus, I might never understand since I walked to school until I was 12 and then took the public bus when I was 13 onwards.

The kids and I also got to bake some cookies and cupcakes when I took a couple of days' off from work. I must say, I could do with more SAHM days...besides spending time with the kids, those afternoon naps are delightful and decadent!

Life as usual

2009-12-07T17:05:00.002+08:00

I work from home on Mondays and Fridays and it is an official arrangement I have made with my boss. I shared with her that I need to send Sara to her Kumon class on those days and mapped out how I was going to make up for the hour on those days. I more than made up for those hours and my boss was nonchalant about it primarily because she works from home most days of the week, too and also because she is in a totally different time zone from me. I didn't set out this post to be my working hour arrangement so let me get back to my point.

I was at Starbucks as I logged on to the office network and worked on a couple of things. And as always, just when the words flowed in my head and I am hammering away on my keyboard intensely, nature calls. And this call cannot be put on hold.

On my way to the public loo, I past by the one and only Papa Rock, Ramli Sarip who was just leaving a nearby bank and was making his way to the town council office a few doors down. I was walking briskly behind him and as I passed him, I gave him salam and told him I was at his last concert at the Esplanade and the husband and I had a blast.

He answered my salam, looked at me and said the concert was great for him too and thanked me for supporting his gig. I grinned and wanted to chat some more but you will recall, nature called and it has turned to an SOS.

I left the loo (finally) and peeked into the town council office and saw the rocker behind the counter, pointing to a piece of paper and talking to the customer service lady. And it finally hit me, even a rock sensation (at least in this little region) runs his own errands...

Sort of sobering as I was starting to sweat about the helper going back on home leave for three weeks from this Sunday. I explored part time help that it was going to cost too much money. But if Papa Rock can do it, then maybe we (the husband, kids, I and my parents) can take care of this house, too. At least for the next three weeks :)

It's Dec? Already?

2009-12-02T15:21:00.002+08:00

I can't believe we are already at the last month of the year!

The kids are enjoying themselves during the holidays, surrounded by cousins and other adults in the family. Some stayed over, some came over. Our neighbour's kids are also now part of the motley crue.

Sara is soldiering on with her revisions and I intend to expose her to some of the Pr 2 topics this month. No rush, we are taking it slow and steady. She's only had one tantrum about studying - when everyone else had completed their one-hour of reading time and were going to go outside to skateboard while she hadn't finished her work. It was tough and involved tears. But insha Allah, that would be the last tantrum. And she will (finally) turn seven in about two weeks' time. Only to join a group of 8 year olds next year at school. Sigh.

Speaking of which, I have moved her to a school nearer to our house. She's going to be taking the school bus and if she had additional school activities, it would be easy enough for the helper to send her to or fetch her from school as the school is only a 5-minute walk from the train station. I'm hoping the new school and environment would be better for her. Please keep her in your prayers.

Sara and I baked a strawberry cake. For real, people. With lots of help from my best bud in the kitchen. Her name is Betty Crocker. The cake turned out beautifully and my confidence in baking is slowly being restored and I am forever indebted to Betty. I am planning to bake some cookies before the month ends. If I don't blog about my cooking adventure, you would know what means because if it was a resounding success, there would be pictorial evidence on this blog.

We've got lots of activities planned out for the kids and the only thing that's standing between us and those plans is TIME. Or more specifically, the husband's and mine. We don't have much leave left to take so we are being very strategic using our leave days.

My parents will insha Allah be moving in this weekend. My mum has packed her beloved chinaware and these are safely kept in my kitchen but apart from that, my parents haven't packed a single thing. But I think once I get them here, we can slowly move their stuff over and by January, they would be ready to rent their place out.

So as you can see, there are lots to do and too little time to do them. And when things are less hectic, the sounds of cricket on this blog would be less frequent.

Food for thought

2009-11-16T15:43:00.001+08:00

Fingularity posted this video up on her site and I love love love it so much that I'm reproducing it here. This video brought tears to these eyes. Enjoy.

Learning from failure

2009-11-12T14:15:00.002+08:00

The kids are back with their final year exam results. The two older kids did well enough, we set out targets earlier on in the year and they both pretty much got the grades that were expected of them. Sara didn't. She did extremely well for her language papers but did not pass her math exams. Sigh.

I thought she might just scrape through, but failing maths at primary 1 is like a slap on the face. Mine, I mean. She was visibly upset when she told me, so at least she knew the repercussion of not passing her exam. But she got over it quickly and was on to the next thing that caught her attention. And so, I do what I do best. I analyse (ok, the husband said unhealthily over-analysing at the most micro-level, but hey, I can't help it).

While I have been trying (and the key word here is *try*) to teach Sara mathematical concepts (that I was once bewildered with and subsequently hated with all my heart and soul), I have also been painfully aware that I was losing her interest. All the drills we were going through, I was questioning if they were helping. And on the day she came home with her result, I got my answer, loud and crystal clear.

I know I have to change my teaching style and I have been having conversations with her tutor and Kumon instructor, too. Sara is better at languages because the words describe a story to her. A story that she can act out in her head and she is free to use her active imagination and different words to describe what's going on in the theatre that exists in her mind.

I *need* to make Maths appeal to her that way. I need to make it fun for her. She's a kinesthetic learner and while she can sit down and do math drills for a little while, she is doing it because she is an obedient child, not because she thinks she's learning anything new. In other words, she is not engaged.

So this school holiday that's coming up, in addition to her Kumon worksheets (which is helping her with speed and accuracy) and tuition, we are to:
- bake cookies and cupcakes; so that she learns mass/weight and after baking we can learn division concepts
- sing songs about multiplication tables (*do not laugh* but I have bought a teaching aid which I think might just do the trick)
- walk to the park so that we may collect different types of leaves and learn division concepts and ordinal numbers from our leaf collection
- cook noodles and spaghetti, before which we study lengths
- play shopping so that we can learn counting money
- play teacher, where she will teach me maths :)

I'm hoping these would go someway into making her understand and more importantly, interested, in maths. I want to make sure she is starting primary two on the right footing, despite her primary 1 maths grade. Insha Allah. So please send me your du'a, prayers or magic dust.

Disconnected

2009-10-31T21:23:00.003+08:00

Sometimes I feel so disconnected with the people around me. I don't feel the joy and I don't see the beauty. I know God's beautiful creations are everywhere and if I even put in an iota of effort, I will see it. But alas, I don't feel like it.

I turned 39 not too long ago and as always I wanted a quiet dinner with the kids and husband. There were a few unexpected guests who came over, with very good intentions of celebrating with us but I wasn't feeling too sociable. While they sat and had cake and chit chat, I was spacing out for most part of the time.

I feel like I am losing my mojo. Not sure what I need to do to reconnect but you know, I am also afraid that I am liking being distant a little too much. I feel like I need my space but I'm not sure what I'd do with all that space? Is this mid life crisis? Too many questions with no answers. Maybe it's time for more self-reflection...

And yes, I am exaggerating

2009-10-26T21:08:00.003+08:00

But not by that much, really.

The trip to the Indonesian embassy was made memorable as I was interviewed by two different officers on how and why the passport went missing. Like, hello? I don't want to get all defensive but the key words were "moved house" and "passport missing" and I have only repeated it all afternoon. I told them we discovered the passport was missing a week before we made the police report as we wanted to make sure we went through all of the boxes. Only to be told that I should've waited for a month before declaring the passport lost. If looks could kill, I would've been held for murder.

The second interview was with another officer who wanted to know how much I paid my helper and how often she gets her day off. Which were harmless questions but I wasn't in a sociable mood anymore, after five hours of mostly waiting, at the embassy. And then of course, I read a story like this which makes me angry because again, employers of domestic helpers need all the bad rep they can get, right?

Preparing Sara for her math exam is taking its toll on me. I have had two bouts of migraine and I think I have finally suitably confused her with my explanations and terrified of me getting all upset when she still doesn't get the concept I was trying to desperately explain to her. I am just thankful that she doesn't need much help with her languages and that we only need to focus on Maths. I am trying very hard to keep my eyes on the ball here.

And Farah has completed her exams but is throwing herself (far too much, I think) in her school drama club. I got really upset when she came home way after dinner and didn't even bother to call to let me know. I hit the roof and gave her a piece of my mind, resulting in much pouting and sulking (her, not me).

The husband will be back tomorrow and it can't come sooner because I am about ready to collapse. And that, is no exaggeration.

Coming up for air...

2009-10-15T12:48:00.003+08:00

What a ride. The endless visitors, the missing passport, the clearing of remaining boxes as part of the passport search exercise, and work, work, work plus exams, exams, exams. I haven't had time for kick-boxing and yoga. Grrrr.

In the meantime, enjoy this video:

Knee-deep...

2009-10-09T13:35:00.003+08:00

...with work. And many visitors at home. No. Time. To. Rest. Helper. Lost. Passport. Horror story about my encounter at the embassy to come soon...

Outrageous!

2009-09-30T10:25:00.002+08:00

For those living in Singapore, did you know that your phone number and address could be listed on yellowpages.com.sg?

If you didn't know, welcome to the club. A friend told me about the website and I was flabbergasted when I found out that my new address and phone numbers were listed there without me providing any authorisation.

I called my service provider up and demanded that they got my numbers removed. Here's the cherry on the cake - I could get my number and address removed as long as I pay $2.14 per month to get my details unlisted.

So, let me get this straight. My service provider gave out my details to yellow pages without informing me, let alone getting authorisation from me, and if I wanted to be removed from yellow pages, I need to pay the service provider monthly payments so that my details which I didn't authorise for them to divulge to third parties, could be removed. Someone please explain the logic to me? Because I think, if anyone gets to profit from this, it should be me. They should be paying me $2.14 per month to have my details on their website.

For now, I told them to unlist my number and I have told them I want to know who's getting the $2.14 per month and why should consumers be paying for something like this. The poor customer service person who got my tirade was obviously tired of my rant by then, and promised he would get his supervisor to call me back. It's been 24 hours and no call. But fret not, I will be calling them soon.

I am annoyed. And if you find your details on yellowpages.com.sg as well, you should be too.

Knackered

2009-09-23T11:02:00.002+08:00

We moved in just in time for Eid, alhamdulillah.

And while we have unpacked some boxes, many more remained untouched. Most were hidden in the store room and others are in the bedrooms. The main idea was to keep them out of sight of guests who came fast and furious. I was telling the husband I don't recall having to host this many number of guests in recent years so I think the attraction was for people to come by to see our new home and Eid was a nice segue to that. I think.

We didn't have a big Eid cook out because like, who's got the energy and time when all we did was unpack, vacuum, mop, wipe, repeat. Family members took pity on us and cooked for us. And in the end, we had more food than we would have if we cooked. One of life's ironies.

So in between unpacking (still!) and visiting the must-visit-relatives and hosting many guests, it is safe to assume that I am glad I am back at work. The respite won't be for too long though as we are expecting more people this weekend and the kids are bringing some friends over.

I'm too tired to even think about what we need to do to prepare for these guests this weekend. Would serving them pizza be considered bad manners...? I could ask for rendang topping to make it a bit more Eid-ish...hmmm there's a thought...

No faaaaiiiirr!

2009-09-17T11:50:00.002+08:00

I lost a few days at the start of Ramadhan and now I'm going to lose a few more at the tail end! In the end, I'm going to owe nine days in total...aargh :(

We like to move it move it

2009-09-16T12:47:00.004+08:00

And moving is exactly what we are doing today and tomorrow, insha Allah.

Feels strange to be surrounded by boxes. I took a look at the number of boxes and was shocked to see how much we've accumulated all these years. Some of the lighter and smaller boxes we've carted almost every evening to the new house because, you know, we are excited like that. I was (still am, at the point of writing this) the last person to pack my clothes. Having said that, I have packed *some* of my clothes and the husband and kids have brought them to the new house.

The strange thing is, even though we are moving to a bigger house and the wardrobe I am sharing with the husband is larger, I think we have run out of space as we've filled that wardrobe and we still have more to bring. And this is *after* I have thrown out clothes that have *ahem* shrunk in size.

Today is the deadline for me to pack my shoes. Not that I have plenty but still, I've been advised to only bring with me what I would actually wear. Hmmmm.

To dispel what would otherwise be an impression of my being disorganised, you would be pleased to know that I have arranged for the new house to have internet connection. We can surf the internet in that house right now, if we wanted to. And cable TV will be installed in the next few days. The guys who are helping me set up the wireless connection are also coming by the end of the week. Impressive, I know. You're welcome.

The husband and the helper have been doing all the heavy lifting because you know, I am delicate, like that. Nonetheless, I have been very supportive of their heavy lifting by staying out of their way.

And so tonight, we will bid our current home fare-thee-well. It housed many memories for all of us and we are sad to leave. But we are also excited to have new happy memories in the new home, insha Allah.

Status update

2009-09-02T09:29:00.002+08:00

In all confidence, I can safely say this is the busiest Ramadhan ever for me.

With the new house keys in hand, the husband and kids are motivated to try to move in in time for Eid. And that means packing which means spring cleaning and packing. As we are on a very tight budget, we are making minimal renovation to the house. Which works well because the workers would be able to complete the work sooner rather than later...or so we're told.

On hindsight, it was quite a good move that most of our Eid preparations are completed. I was hoping to just focus on Ramadhan but it now looks like while one task was completed ahead of schedule, another has been placed on our plate. But I remind myself to give thanks that I have these happy "problems" (if you could call them that) to solve.

Shifting gears, I was driving Farah to school to this morning and turned on the radio. Only to be greeted with Hari Raya songs. We both looked at each other and thought out loud that it's way too early to be playing those songs. We're only into 12 days of Ramadhan. I think the Malay radio stations should play the songs from the 15th day onwards...for some reason the half-way mark is significant to me. And then after those songs, the Raya ads came on ad nauseum, luring listeners to "buy now, pay later". The spiral down to credit crunch starts with that one temptation...

Until then, Ramadhan Kareem to those who are fasting!

Wishing everyone

2009-08-21T16:00:00.000+08:00

Pic credit

The sound of silence

2009-08-18T10:57:00.002+08:00

I try to pick Sara up from school in the evenings. The school lets parents and care givers proceed to an area near the school compound to wait for the kids, after the kids have sung the national anthem. The classes are then moved into groups to be brought to the different gates around the school, depending on where the students will be picked up. Everything is orderly.

But I get amused when the teacher who has the microphone in hand, would order the kids to "keep silent!". She would actually detain the class which she deems as making too much noise. And this happens almost every time I pick Sara up. I don't know of any school that can get kids to be silent all the time so the teacher's efforts may be futile, I think. Anyways, aren't normal happy kids supposed to be boisterous?

So this is something I don't get. I can understand if the teachers insist the kids walk instead of run - to avoid accidents. But to make sure the kids are quiet even after school hours? I don't think its necessary.

Anyhow, much to the teacher's dismay, once the kids leave the compound, you can hear laughing, talking. And that's the sound I prefer to hear.

Tagged!

2009-08-12T10:59:00.003+08:00

I've been tagged by a lovely young lady whom I had the pleasure of getting acquainted to in the wonderful world of the web. I'm not sure if my total of four readers would be interested in the list about me but here goes:

Ten Honest Things About Me

1. The husband is my source of strength and weakness. I love the man to bits. He has the unique the ablility to draw out the best in me. And oddly, the worse in me, too.

2. I love my kids. And hard as it may, I try to temper my boundless love for them with discipline that I think will help them in their life. I want them to be able to pursue what they love doing. Except, Danial would never be able to be a fighter pilot nor an admiral in the navy in this little island that we live in. And that makes me angry.

3. I had kid-phobia and so the husband and I never discussed having kids the entire time we were dating/engaged. When we found out we were pregnant for the first time, the husband thought I might not want to keep the baby.

4. I am fiercely loyal to friends. I've been told this is a typical Scorpio trait. Not sure what that means since I am not into zodiac or horoscope (are they even the same thing?).

5. I have had four major surgeries in my life. Yes, I have had a complicated medical history and hopefully that means I have reached the quota of major surgeries of my life and I won't have to go through another one.

6. I have only discovered God not too long ago. The jolt/reminder/final call came when I lost my child. Veering close to depression, it occured to me I had to let go and trust the plan God had for me. As a Muslim, I am indeed a work-in-progress.

7. I am actually very funny. My quiet demeanour belies my humour and acquaintances usually are very surprised when I crack a joke. But no, I am no stand-up comedienne material. Not by a long shot.

8. I like my food spicy. All hail the queen of spice and chillies. I don't get why anyone would want to eat bland food.

9. I love my job and plan my career. It pays the bills and allows me to help support the family. And for that, I give thanks to God daily.

10. I am very uncompetitive by nature. I know, its an oxymoron to be have a career and not be competitive. How do you climb the corporate ladder otherwise, you're asking? I don't have an answer. I only keep my head down and do the work that been entrusted to me and do them to the best of my abilities and get the results that are needed. Sometimes I get a pat on my back for the results, sometimes, other people do. Such is the corporate world. But my being uncompetitive extends beyond work. It is also reflected in my hobby - reading (has anyone heard of reading competitions?).

And that's pretty much it. If you made it all the way here, you are a very patient (and inquisitive!) person. And if you forward this post in the next 5 mins to 10 people, you will mysteriously receive $1000 in your bank account.

A deep and meaningful conversation...

2009-08-06T12:16:00.002+08:00

Sara is down with fever. And with the husband away, she bunked in with me. We kill two birds with one stone with that. She gets to sleep in my big bed and I get to check on her all night without having to really wake up fully.

At 2am her body was so warm that I had to give her another dose of paracetamol and sponge her down. She wasn't cranky at all, in fact she enjoyed waking up in the wee hours of the morning. What would two girls do when one needs to be sponged and the other needs to do the sponging? We discuss the existence of mermaids, of course!

Her: Do mermaids exist, mummy?
Me: I don't think so, darling.
Her: Why don't you think so.
Me: Because no one has ever seen a mermaid. And the people who have explored the deepest oceans, have never seen a mermaid before.
Her: I think they do exist. I think they are very good at hiding. Just because we haven't seen mermaids, it doesn't mean they don't exist. Right, mummy?
Me: Yes, you are right.
Her: I also think the mermaids would be very sad if people don't believe they exist. I would be sad if people don't believe I exist.
Me: Hmmm.
Her: But how do you know I exist, mummy?
Me: Because you are here with me.
Her: But what if you can't see me?
Me: I would know you exist because I have seen you and will love you no matter where you are.
Her: So that's why I love mermaids. Even though I can't see them, I know they are there.
Me: But you've never seen them before.
Her: I've seen them in cartoons but I know cartoons are not real. But I know they exist. And they feel sad and happy just like you and me, mummy. And maybe, when the girl mermaid has a fever, her mummy would also sponge her and give her medicine. And maybe, just maybe mummy, she is asking her mermaid mummy if little human girls exist, too.

And hence, this is one of the reasons why I think my little girl is intelligent. Even though her brilliance is not picked up by the school benchmarks of exams and tests.

To be thankful for

2009-08-04T12:53:00.002+08:00

I've got lots to be thankful for, besides having the gift of life, good health and being surrounded by good people...

1. I have a husband who gives his heart and soul to me
2. Danial is on Kumon's honour roll for both English and Maths - we didn't even know he was in the running.
3. Sara has shown so much improvement and so much more interest in schoolwork
4. Farah is showing signs of maturity and taking more ownership than before
5. Relationships with family members which were cold and distant are now starting to warm up
6. My workload would be less hectic when the new hire comes on board in a few weeks' time
7. I'm reconnected with old school friends and rediscovering them as new friends
8. Another bunch of old friends are coming to my house for tea next week
9. I haven't lost my interest in exercising - yoga and kick boxing are my drugs
10. The keys to our new home will be with us shortly, insha Allah.

I know this post is saccharine-sweet but I really can't help it. I think I am blessed and I bet you are, too.

My two favourite things

2009-07-31T17:08:00.002+08:00

Actually that should say two of my favourite things...yoga and Jason Mraz. Check out this video, it is HILARIOUS. Next pose I need to master is the "laundry tumbler" asana.

OK folks, breathe in....breathe out.....

An ode

2009-07-27T10:13:00.003+08:00

The wonders of Facebook is such that you get connected to long-lost friends, and get to choose who you include in your friends list and who you don't. What you choose to share with your friends and they share with you, become the basis of what you know about them and they about you.

But I've recently discovered, Facebook is also a tool to announce deaths. A few weeks ago, I learnt about an old schoolmate who passed away. At age 39, she succumbed to cancer and left behind a distraught husband and five young kids. How my heart breaks. I could only cry silent tears and a quiet prayer. Never mind I have not seen her in years. We connected online and caught up via Facebook. And that was enough. The the effect of learning about her passing is devastating to me.

This friend will be remembered as a strong and courageous Muslimah. And I pray her children will be given strength to continue with their lives.

And then on the weekend, I learnt about the passing of yet another wonderful human being. My favourite movie director, Yasmin Ahmad, passed away suddenly. I don't know her personally but follow her blog and watch her movies. But the news of her passing still struck me as if she's a friend.

Yasmin leaves a huge void in the Malay film industry. She raised the industry's benchmark - viewers are no longer happy with the status quo - the viewers having tasted intelligent movies that encompasses more than boy-meets-girl and the associated drama, will demand more. But I'm not sure if the current calibre of directors we have out there will rise to the occasion.

From God we come, and to Him we return.

In my mind,

2009-07-16T21:49:00.003+08:00

I have blogged about:

1. The time when I had to raise my voice at a clinic assistant. She chided me for bringing my breathless son to the clinic 10mins after it's closing time. Nevermind the clinic does not state it's operating hours and the sign still says "Open". I told her Danial was wheezing and needed to see the doctor quickly. Only to be told that I should've brought him in earlier. I raised my voice and asked her how was I supposed to know Danial's lungs would start wheezing and if she could tell me, I'd be sure to make an appointment ahead of time.

We finally got to see the doctor whom, after 3 seconds of putting the stethoscope on Danial's chest said the boy's not wheezing. He promptly asked me if I was new to the neighbourhood. I said we weren't new to the neighbourhood but were new to the clinic because of the change in my company's insurer. He then took the liberty to advise me of the clinic's opening hours and that he might not be in the clinic even if he had house calls to make. If looks could kill, he would've been dead by then.

2. My strategy + my plan + my hard work = someone else's credit. No recognition of a job well done. Instead someone else basked in its glory, shamelessly accepting all the kudos, taking in all the credit. I've seen this happen many times; in fact this is not the first time it's happened to me in my 20 years of working life. But man, what happened recently just took this corporate game to the next (lowest) level.

3. The day when I had a panic attack because I thought I had lost my 15-year old engagement ring. I finally found it in my yoga bag. I was careless and mad at myself for a while.

4. During a recent work trip, I was too tired from all day meetings and not enough sleep that I actually fell forward while on an escalator going up. A colleague, after making sure I was alright, decided to let out a chuckle and said the lemonade I had at dinner was way too potent. My both shins were bruised, but not as much as my ego. But thank goodness I didn't fall far enough to end up smelling the ass of the person who was standing in front of me. And thank goodness I didn't fall backwards. *That* would have been disastrous.

5. Watching "Duplicity" in the plane was a waste of time. But then, in the plane, you have time to waste. I've always thought Julia Roberts, while hot, looks horse-y. Clive Owen is the new heart throb. But the movie sucks. Big time. I can't believe a bunch of ex agents could be so gullible. Can someone please bring back Jason Bourne?

And that is all.

I'm taking deep breaths

2009-07-14T12:26:00.001+08:00

Because I am sick of the cookie-cutter way of doing things. Where there is no space for differentiation. The world is not all black or white. Give me a break already. (end of rant)

Tears and Fears

2009-07-07T17:01:00.003+08:00

So after not travelling for a long while, having to pack my luggage and saying goodbye to the kids were the most painful things ever. Not to add the fact that the husband is also travelling the same week I'll be gone. Thank goodness my mother has stepped in to look after the kids.

Last night, the act of putting my clothes and getting my stuff organised proved to be a little too sad for Sara. She saw me packing and ran to my bed and buried her face in the pillows, crying soft tears. I had to fight back my own tears to soothe her. And then Danial and Farah too came to my room both teary :(

I called home this morning and my mother said Sara cried a little in the morning but was soothed and was better. She called me three times before she left for school, too. I told the kids that they could call me anytime they need. My phone bill will shoot through the roof but I think it's money well-spent.

Wow...

2009-07-02T12:53:00.003+08:00

I can't believe:

1. MJ is dead but the circus around him continues unabated
2. Danial thought MJ was dead a long time ago because he's never heard any new songs from MJ at all
3. Danial is trying to master the moonwalk
4. My business travel is starting up after almost one year of travel ban and here I am getting very used to being grounded
5. School term just started and the kids are already bringing back loads of homework everyday
6. The month of Rejab is here, and soon Ramadhan will be here and I have yet to start fasting the days I lost last year
7. We are already in July
8. I think I need another holiday
9. The Ministry of Health has given up telling people to stay away from countries where H1N1 is spreading fast - not least because we ourselves are on that list. Tragic comedy, don't you think?
10. No one is watching the Asian Youth Games - at least in my household

Today...

2009-06-29T12:31:00.003+08:00

...we mark 13 years of togetherness. Alhamdulillah.

Picture from here.

The many holidays

2009-06-24T11:18:00.003+08:00

We were off to Ho Chi Minh City for a couple of days. A trip that was planned way back in February and instigated by a cautionary email from SingaporeAirlines about miles which were going to expire if we didn't redeem soon. So we looked at places we could afford for six, redeemed six tickets and paid close to $700 for taxes and surcharges (aargh) and we got our tickets.

The weather was lovely and we walked around the city - gingerly avoiding the chaotic traffic that does not follow much traffic rules. We took some time to orientate ourselves with the area and found a masjid nearby and a couple of halal eating places, well frequented by Muslims from mostly Singapore, Malaysia and Brunei. We felt so at home :) If anyone is looking for a good halal place in District 1, we highly recommend Halal@Saigon which is right in front of the masjid on Dung Do street (do not laugh, that is the name of the street and it's pronounced Doong Do). Very good Vietnamese food as well as local Malay food at reasonable prices. The restaurant is started by a Malaysian lady and she has several staff who speak good English and sometimes impress you with their Malay.

After a day spent roaming around the city, we booked a local tour to the Cu Chi tunnel, and we were awed by the Vietnamese for creating such a complex and organised underground tunnel and weapons that outwit and outmanouvered the heavily armed and supposedly more sophisticated US army. The pictures we saw at the War Museum were shocking. If there was anything that drove the message of "War is Bad" to the kids, those pictures were it. Torn limbs and twisted and mangled bodies...sigh.

As part of our tour we had a boat and sampan ride along the Mekong Delta. Where we noticed the resourcefulness of the ladies who were so hospitable and talented in handicraft work and kept themselves busy hawking those wares. There were also ladies running a mini honey/bee factory and other cottage-industies. And we also noticed the men rocking themselves in hammocks, smoking their cigarettes and occasionally getting up from their hammocks to drink the honey and lemon tea prepared by the said ladies.

Unfortunately, because of something he ate, the husband morphed into a merlion two days before we left HCM. I was quite frantic about him developing a fever and possibly being quarantined. But alhamdulillah, he was well enough to travel home after some self-prescribed medication. In the meantime, I brought the kids out to sight-see while he rested in the room. Alone. In a quiet room. With the Australian cable channel with the latest rugby matches on.

I fell in love with the lacquerware (read: pretty and cheap) and bought a couple of things that would be nice for the new house. I've convinced the husband we would come back for some serious shopping closer to when we get the keys to our new house, insha Allah.

Speaking of which, we heard that we'd be given our keys perhaps in August/September, a couple of months earlier than the December date we were officially told. That only means, of course, we need to go back to HCM soon!

I am blessed...

2009-06-15T11:56:00.005+08:00

(so altogether now, say alhamdulillah). We just hosted two terrific families at our Melaka house over the weekend. They were just the most fun people to be with and we loved the fact that they wanted to come visit our house there.

The best part of the entire thing is the solat jemaah. I love the azan and when it melodiously rings live in my house, it brings tears to my eyes. It is both humbling and liberating at the same time. And Danial got his chance reciting his iqamah at one of the solahs and we were so proud he did it so well and with much confidence.

And as we always do when we're there, we ate lots, laughed plenty and shopped too much.

So as I was struggling to start my Monday I began reflecting on my weekend that has just passed, and I realised I have lots to be thankful for. I am thankful for being blessed with great friends and family members who lift me spiritually and make me want to improve myself as a person, mother and wife.

Picture from here.

All I can say...

2009-06-10T16:05:00.000+08:00

to this story is...no shit, Sherlock!

Sweet Charity

2009-06-01T12:11:00.003+08:00

So the husband and I were at the concert of what is the best Malay rock band in the region. Singapore-born and bred. The root of all the other rock bands. It was an extremely fun concert to watch. I was hoping there was a mosh pit where we could scream like crazy teenagers but alas, it was held at the respectable Esplanade and everyone was too well-behaved and considerate. But the guys on stage rocked it anyways and we sang along.

The beauty of the band and frontman Ramli Sarip - besides their talent - is in the songs. Their songs are not always about love and broken relationships. They write and sing about politics, current affairs and most times, about God. And the husband and I as life-long tasauf students, found deep meaning in the lyrics of their song. Amazing that they've included the concept of One-ness and Great-ness in a music genre that is often associated to many vice.

And then of course, there is that killer drummer that the husband has proclaimed is as good, if not better, than Deep Purple's drummer. I bet if I saw him on the streets of Singapore, I would not recognise this man as the man pounding that drum set with perfect timing and rhythm. He is bald, wears glasses and looks well, ordinary. But behind the drums, he's phenomenal.

It was certainly a night to remember.

Really?

2009-05-29T16:04:00.003+08:00

I get lots of junk mail. I get enough that I think I have some authority when I say they can be broadly categorised into two - the ones that promise men and women a gazillion dollars if only they would respond to the person who wrote them with their bank account number and the ones that promise men eternal hard on to please the woman/women in his life.

These email annoy me sometimes and amuse me other times.

And then, like today, as I am rushing to finish work so that I can be home when the kids are at home seeing today is the designated "Dinner with your family day" and the kids will be leaving school at 5pm, and I have two deadlines to get to before 5pm and I am starting to hyperventilate, I see this email in my inbox:

Hey you, do you want to please your woman 5 times a night?

The tea I was sipping nearly came out of my nose.

First off, I don't think the husband would be thrilled if I was thiniking of pleasing any "woman 5 times a night". He's competitive in nature so I'm pretty sure he would not like that idea very much. And really? 5 times a night? If anyone thought that, he/she should really get a hobby or watch more TV. Don't you think?

Done and dusted...well almost

2009-05-25T11:14:00.003+08:00

We found a buyer for our current apartment. The deposit has been given to us and the first round of signings have been done. Soon, we'll proceed with the next round of signing of papers.

And we've put down a deposit for that house the husband fell in love with. And truth be told, I started to fall in love with it, too. And so did the kids. And my parents whom we brought to view the house over the weekend. Hopefully the husband's parents will also like it, too when we bring them over this weekend.

The buyers of our apartment are not Muslims. I was thinking out loud to the husband that I was feeling a bit wistful as the apartment is a Muslim apartment since we are Muslims. And now that ownership of the house will be transfered to these nice people with a different religion, would the house then adopt and assume the new owners' religion? And isn't that too, too sad? That the apartment is changing it's religion? He looked at me with a puzzled look and then said, "Well you could pray for the apartment to remain Muslim despite the new owners' religion, if you want? Although I think all creations man-made or otherwise belong to one Creator?" Tsk.

After my moment of wistfulness was rudely interrupted, we then talked about the cleaning and packing that we need to start doing. I told the husband we should junk all the furniture and buy new ones and that it's really OK to do so because we've had these furniture for at least 12 years now and some were given to us. But no go. We need to be bring what we can bring over and then buy what we can't bring over. There goes my grand plan of unlimited shopping, as he reminds me of the limited cash we have. Oh, why won't money grow on trees...

Aaargh

2009-05-21T10:38:00.000+08:00

What were you thinking, America???

Of late...

2009-05-12T12:46:00.002+08:00

We have been doing lots of revising because the dreaded exams period is upon us. And of late, we have been squeezing time for house-hunting as well. The more houses we went to see, the more I'm put off living in a condo. And on Saturday, I knew for sure condo living is not for me.

This is after we went to view a unit in a condo in the northern area. Apparently, it is a very classy condo with many doctors and lawyers staying there. I guess if the husband or I had a cardiac arrest or were being sued - the order of the sequence could be interchangeable - help would be nearby?

So us, non-doctor and non-lawyer, drove through the entrance of the condo on a hot Saturday afternoon, only to be honked loudly by a resident who thought I would bump his swanky SUV, as I was reversing to get my car nicely into teeny tiny entrance of the car park. Then, as we were walking around the compound, residents came out onto their balcony, looking at the husband, my SIL and I. I guess they were curious to see non-residents in their premises? The entire time we were walking around the condo, no one smiled, the husband observed. I just didn't get any good vibes from looking at the residents. They can keep their condo. I sure don't want to be with people who think they are better than others just because of their home address.

We are now back looking at houses at the deep northern area. And it looks like we are leaning towards this unit. After istikhara, I am more at peace with the decision. Price is looking good and we are working out the logistics of day-to-day living with the kids. We've just received in-principle approval on the bank loan. Insha Allah, the deal will be signed in the next day or so.

The long weekend that was

2009-05-04T17:47:00.004+08:00

So this weekend, Farah turned 14. As with our family tradition, there was no big party. We planned for a nice and quiet dinner together and she asked if her father could be included. If you are a new reader, just to clarify, her father and I were not married. Oops, that wasn't a good clarification. Let's try this one more time. Her father was married to the husband's late sister. They were divorced before the husband's sister passed away and custody was given to the husband. We keep in touch with him because of Farah as we didn't want her to severe ties with her dad. That would be wrong on many levels.

Anyways, we went house hunting over the long weekend. We went to see a house that the husband is absolutely crazy about. He knows I wanted somewhere near a school the younger kids could go to and a place near the train station. The place he wants is by the beach and a nature park. And yes, the area is tranquil and nice but there is no school nearby and no train station in sight. We need to take a bus to get to civilisation. I am not thrilled but the kids and him are. He's still trying to talk me round the idea. And I am letting him do that provided he tells me exactly how we're going to manage day-to-day living in that area. He thinks I'm a tough sell. I think I'm just being pragmatic.

And the rest of the long weekend was spent revising. The exams. They are just around the corner. The two older kids are coping well. Sara, well, I've been telling her to study hard, to do her best and make plenty of du'as. We've had much to study and worksheets to do from her school. She's been making great progress but I'm not sure if it's enough to stay afloat at school. The irony is she is such a personable and an incredibly inquisitive and observant child. But I guess these things don't count for much in an education system that we have here.

Hunting

2009-04-22T13:24:00.002+08:00

We are house-hunting, everyone! Quite exciting for me! The idea of living in a new place with new furniture (I hope!) is tripping me like Michael Phelps was tripping on...oops, nevermind.

We have been looking at some possibilities the past couple of months as prices on some developments have been coming down sharp and nasty. And we think it's a good time to look at buying another property as we only have a couple of years' mortgage on our current apartment. So we think the stars are starting to align in our favour.

This Sunday, we've asked for my SIL, who's also a property agent (anyone who needs a trustworthy and hardworking agent, drop me a mail!) for a couple of houses to view. My requirements are very simple - it has to be near a train station (we don't want to be next to it, just within walking distance), primary schools for the two chickadees to go (again, walking distance would be ideal), near a suburb mall so that it's easy for us to run out and get a pack of salt or sugar or anything we might need, and it has to be a low-rise development. Simple requirements, eh?

We've done our maths and we know how much we can afford and will approach various banks to see the loan amount we can get and who can give the best rates. The do-our-maths-before-we-view-and-fall-madly-in-love-with-houses-we-see is the husband's way of keeping me on the straight and narrow.

We are taking the kiddies and the helper to see these houses as I want them to be fully involved - after all, they would be living there, too. Wheeeeee!

Post Bangkok Guest

2009-04-20T12:26:00.003+08:00

In a nutshell, I think she had fun. And we did, too. Even Danial who weren't thrilled at the idea in the beginning ("Oh great. That's what we really need, mum. Another girl in the house.") Farah was super busy getting involved in various activities that the school planned for the exchange students and now playing catch-up with the school work that she missed the entire week, last week. Fun times ahead, no doubt.

I am also sad to say that while I do not have an affinity with D/isney Channel merchandise, those were the glue that bound the two teenage girls in my house.

Just before the student left our house, Sara had already poured her heart out to her. She has proclaimed that the student will forever be her best friend. And drew many cards and hearts that she expected the student will bring home with her. The connection was not one-sided either.

The student asked my permission if she could bring Sara home, seeing that the student is an only child and by now realised that having an adoring younger sister is definitely a good thing. I told her she could do so, if Sara could fit into her luggage. I heard Sara actually tried to squeeze into it, but decided against it since the luggage would need to be zipped and locked up. She doesn't like to be in the dark.

The two girls (Farah and the student) will meet again in November for when my girl will go to Bangkok to stay with another family. So it's not really goodbye for them, just a see-you-later.

Yet another special guest

2009-04-07T12:57:00.002+08:00

This time, all the way from Bangkok.

Farah has been selected to participate in a student exchange programme at school and part of the deal is that we have to host a visiting student for a week. There will be about 20 kids coming through from a school in Bangkok and one of them will be with us starting this Friday.

We are now busy planning what to do/where to go to show our guest our country, our culture and damnit, the capital of Singapore - Orchard Road.

I hope she'll like our house. And she'll like our food. Coz if I were her, those two would be a deal breaker.

I have also told Danial, who has the tendency of annoying her sisters with his antics - such as chasing them around the house pretending he was a dog or that he had a cockroach in his hand - to be on his best behaviour. It'll be tough but since I know his weakness, I think we'll be oookay.

Reunion

2009-04-03T09:47:00.003+08:00

We are expecting special guests for dinner tomorrow.

The husband has recently been reunited with a long lost "brother"; one whom he hasn't seen for at least 10 years. They recently reconnected via Facebook (is that cool, or is that cool?!) and met for a private reunion last week. This weekend, the long lost brother is coming with his wife to have dinner with us. My bro-in-law is also coming with his fiance to join in the festivities. I am quite psyched up.

This will be the first time my kids will be meeting with their "uncle" and I will be seeing him after a long while and will be meeting his wife for the first time.

And so, this weekend chef (yes, that would be *me*, people) will be getting busy in the kitchen. I have a menu planned out and timing worked out to squeeze this feast-cooking time in between my Saturday routine. In short, I will be beezee but I will be happeee (I had to add three "e"s in that spelling because I wanted it to alliterate but putting in two "e"s might conjure another unintentional meaning).

Yippeee (notice, there are also three "e"s to avoid the same unintentional meaning) and TGIF.

What is up

2009-04-02T10:57:00.002+08:00

with Abdul and Cowell? Please someone tell them to get a room (and I think Seacrest did) and get the sexual tension between them over and done with. The antics are getting quite old and annoying.

And what is up with Randy? Why is everyone a dawg and why does he have to say "check it out" twice twice?

Also, they should just end the entire season because we all know who will win. That Adam Lambert boy is in a league of his own, he will win it. In fact, he should do himself a favour and drop out so that someone can offer him a big-ass contract and I will buy his album and go to his concert.

Play that funky music white boy! Coz you are uhm dope, dawg.

Pfffftt!

2009-03-30T11:47:00.003+08:00

So on Earth Hour on Saturday, we turned out the lights and huddled over the small TV in my room. We had a candle burning in the room, and the helper had her own candle in her room and had the small battery-powered transistor radio turned on for her own entertainment.

Whoever who had to go to the loo had the option of bringing the candle into the loo or had to do it in the dark. And because the fan was turned off, whoever had to do number two, had to do it at the toilet outside of the room we were in, thankyou. In the end, everyone held off and there was a queue by the time 9.30pm was upon us.

At the 30 minute mark, Farah started to wonder if our neighbours and neighbourhood were taking part in Earth Hour. We all walked gingerly to the kitchen, looked out and up our window kitchen (we are on the second floor) and much to our disappointment, lights galore in the other apartments. So we speculated as to why people were not observing the hour as we were. Sara thinks it's probably because their teachers didn't remind them about Earth Hour before school ended on Friday evening. The rest of us adults and near-adults dismissed it as apathy. And decided apathy was bad.

Tragedy

2009-03-24T13:39:00.002+08:00

I heard this news on my commute to the office this morning. What a tragedy.

The news headline is perplexing to me though. My question is, how do you "get hit by the train" unless you are standing on or near the tracks? Which then implies suicidal intent.

It's quite tragic that our train tracks are fast becoming a choice location to end one's life.

We were at Bollywood

2009-03-23T13:57:00.007+08:00

Bollywood Veggies, that is. We were there, thanks to Mr Malique's suggestion. Farah didn't want to join us. Something about it's too hot to be outdoors and wanting to curl up in bed with the third instalment of that book about a certain teenage vampire. So it was the three of us. A city mum and two city kids who think live chickens are a sight to watch, going to an organic farm. We had a ball, going through the farm. And then rewarded ourselves with some iced aloe vera juice and cold lemongrass tea. And oh yes, there were also banana cake with vanila ice cream and chocolate sauce. Yummms.

Ponder on this...

2009-03-18T10:54:00.003+08:00

I had a very bad nightmare last night. I dreamt I was in a car accident with the husband. The accident itself is quite funny, come to think about it. We got into my car - someone else was driving so we got onto the back seat. For some reason, the car was parked on a trapped door which opened up once we got in and plunged us straight down. Long story short, we both died. Then I started to see the kids. I saw the kids crying uncontrollably and they were screaming in disbelief. There was no picture of calmness and serenity. It was chaotic and heart wrenching. I woke up in tears.

Because I am morbid, I have had conversations with the husband every now and then about how I want the kids to be raised should I die ahead of him. And I told him my jewellery may not be passed on to his new wife (I know, digression but hey, we need a light moment at this point). Surprisingly, the husband said he sees no need to tell me how to raise the kids if he went first since he knows I would continue to be the best mum for them. Hmmm. Ouch.

But what if we both died at the same time? We have not made any plans for that. And that worries me. I wonder if any of our siblings would step forward to look after our kids. In that instance, I remember Farah's late mother, and understand how she felt as she laid on her death bed and asked if the husband would look after her only daughter.

My emotions are in overdrive today - can you tell? But these are hard questions that I need to think about and find some sort of resolution to. Because death can happen at any time. And apart from worrying about how I shall face God and be answerable for all my deeds in this world, I think it's only fair for me to ensure my kids will also find peace and the resolve to move on with their lives when I'm not there with them.

Inspiration

2009-03-17T10:14:00.002+08:00

If you are feeling bleargh, watch this video. It is inspiring. May Allah bless these people who lift communities out of poverty and empower women with education, knowledge and skills. Ameen.

http://www.pbs.org/wnet/religionandethics/episodes/march-13-2009/barefoot-college-in-india/311/

Dum deedum deedum

2009-03-16T20:46:00.003+08:00

With the school holidays upon us, the kids are now with their cousins until late tonight. I came back from work, drove them to their cousins' (who live 5 minutes away) and then drove back home to get ready for the next two calls I had to dial into...yawn.

I had a few hours in between the calls, and with no kids, no husband (travelling) I decided to vege out in front of the television. Before that, I bought a whole bag of chips which I totally cleaned out in 10 mins flat. Once done with that delightful task, the television was turned on and after channel surfing, I ended up watching The Biggest Losers. Hmmmmm. Is there a message somewhere there for me?

So now I am waiting for my next call to start before I go collect the kids.

The good news is I am taking Thurs and Fri off to do something exciting with them. Not sure what it is that we'll do but darn it, it would be FUN. Any ideas, let me know.

Losing the fight

2009-03-09T13:50:00.003+08:00

I had a fantastic weekend, alhamdulillah.

The concert was the BEST. The husband didn't fall asleep and even admitted that Anuar Zain is really talented. I am amazed though at how some people are fanatical in their love for him... won't go into details but interesting to observe all the same.

Sunday was spent at home and then the afternoon outdoors with the kids at the sports complex. Just running and playing around. And for some reason, I came home with the sniffles. This morning, I can feel the body getting achy... the sniffles are still there but I'm going home to rest but I fear I am losing the fight...

And off we go!

2009-03-05T13:30:00.003+08:00

I have managed to convince the husband to attend a concert with me this Saturday. I have to bow to my own persuasive abilities (patting myself on the back now). As a result, he is coming with me to a concert by Anuar Zain whose concert earlier this year I missed - can't remember why but I'm sure it's work-related.

The tickets have been picked up and my outfit has been planned. Can you tell I'm quite excited? The man (Anuar Z, not the husband) is a talented singer and is super pleasing to the eyes, so I'm sure I will have a blast. The man (the husband, not Anuar Z) has told me in quite certain terms that he will try to slink in his seat as he would not want to be caught attending this concert. I've also been sworn to secrecy about this so please don't tell anyone, OK? And I've been told to go easy on the camera and ensure he is not in any of the pictures I'll be taking. Soo many demands and restrictions but I KNOW he will have as much fun as I will.

I'm pretty sure he'll be a fan at the end of it all. Resistance is futile!

Defying stereotypes

2009-03-03T14:54:00.004+08:00

I've always tried to do it - defy stereotypes. Sometimes with some success, other times not so.

But here's one stereotype that has been blown to bits. Here's my favourite green guy, Kermit the Frog. He's proof that not all frogs croak. Rock on little green man, er I mean, frog.

Getting some sun

2009-03-02T14:59:00.002+08:00

Sara has loads to do over the weekend. I'm getting really worried for her. I'm so afraid she will break under the pressure - but she has lots to do to catch up on. It breaks my heart to see my little girl struggling like that.

My SIL who is an early childhood development expert has warned us that we need to be careful to not kill her interest in learning in our effort to get her up-to-speed. Sombre reminder there.

I think this weekend, if the weather holds up, we might go to the park. Spend an afternoon there and have a mini picnic. I need the sun. And Sara needs the break.

Huh?

2009-02-26T12:15:00.003+08:00

I get lots of junk mail in my personal email address. And for some reason more in my hotm/ail than yah/oo account. Too many of these mail think I need Vi/agr/a so that I could turn my supposedly earthworm-size equipment to a ready-to-strike cobra.

I'm not one to judge if you feel like you need a cobra in your pants, but that imagery just made me laugh out loud.

More ramblings

2009-02-25T11:07:00.003+08:00

It just occured to me that while my posts on this blog have been infrequent, they are enough to show the wide web world that I don't do Monday very well. I am also starting to worry that my moodiness (is that even a word?) is rubbing off the kids. And so, I will pledge to cut out the ramblings about bad Mondays because my problems with dealing with Monday are so small compared to problems others might have. Like her's, for example.

Changing topic completely, if you have been reading my posts (and if not, why not?) you would know that Sara is having some problems coping with schoolwork. Everyone's pitching in to help. But the extent of it all presented itself yesterday evening. She told me she and another girl in her class have been moved to a different Math class to join seven other kids with a different teacher. Sigh.

I know, I know. I can choose to take a positive stance and tell myself, she is getting more individualised attention which she needs. And I try. But the sadness is there. I'm thankful though that she doesn't know the move heralds a not-so-positive meaning. Such is the sweet innocence of a child.

It is important to me that she is enjoying school and thus far, she seems to be. Even if she has more homework to do than the other two kiddies. That's the thing about my littlest girl. She has such tenacity and happily keeps at it, oblivious to everything else.

Speaking of being happy, I received a lovely email this morning from Mr & Mrs JB who will be in transit in Singapore on Friday and we are meeting for lunch. Yay! Their house and vineyard in Melbourne were burnt down because of the forest fires, but they are happy they still have each other. And this adds to why Friday is by far my most favourite day of the week. And I am counting the days to Friday...

You know it'll be a tough Monday when...

2009-02-23T10:21:00.003+08:00

... you didn't wake up early enough to get to your yoga class as you promised yourself the night before. And the night before. And the night before.

... you saw a flurry of email on your blackberry this morning on something that happened over the wekend and you know you have s&*t to clean up and that would take all morning.

... you realise you have no money and no ATM card because you moved your cash, bank card, credit card and drivers licence to the weekend wristlet because you didn't want to lug your big work bag everywhere else.

... you still feel crampy and generally annoyed at everything and everyone.

... you want to crawl back into bed and wish hard it's not Monday yet.

Why are Mondays difficult?

2009-02-16T14:34:00.002+08:00

I'm lamenting that question quietly to myself at the office.

I'm sleepy and tired from my big lunch. I over compensated from not having any breakfast and pigged out at lunch because I was starved. Now I feel like a dozen donkeys are hanging on my eyelids.

The reason why I had not breakfast this morning is because I was too nervous. I had an important call this morning and couldn't eat and even with the prep work and anxiety, I didn't do well on the call. Aargh.

And because today is Sara's first day of being liberated from the school care center, she's called me at least five times this morning. Apparently she's been calling the husband, too. Just to, you know, chit chat. I'm glad she's left for school and will have other people to talk to.

I want to go home. Correction.

I want to go home and SLEEP off this Monday blues...

Change we must

2009-02-13T09:52:00.002+08:00

Many changes from next week onwards.

The husband and I had been talking about pulling Sara out of the student care center for a couple of days. Nothing against the center because Farah attended this center in the past. We just think the long hours are just too much for Sara (she leaves the house at 7am and comes home from school at 6.30pm). And because she learns differently from other kids, we think one-on-one coaching would help her more.

I have been on a look-out for a tutor since we've been contemplating the withdrawal but the entire thing became urgent for me when Sara came home from school last evening, crying because "her head hurts" and fell asleep in tears, on the couch, in her school uniform. I had to wake her up at 9.30pm so that she could have some dinner. After a quick dinner, she finished off her school homework before promptly going back to bed.

So, in lightning-speed timing, the plan has been put to action. I have now confirmed a tutor who could come on weekday mornings for an hour daily. Sara can spend that additional hour or two before she heads off to school by playing or relaxing. The TV is off-limits and the helper has been told to enforce. Revisions will be done by yours truly on the weekends. Insha Allah this arrangement will work out better.

At least Sara seems pleased when I told her this morning that today will be her last day at the center. Her first words to me were "it means I can sleep more hours right, mummy?". Sigh. It also means we lose our one-month deposit because we were supposed to give a month's notice period to the center. But hey, my kid's health and happiness are definitely worth much more.

The story

2009-02-11T08:20:00.000+08:00

I mentioned in my post on Feb 9 that Sara has written a story on a cat. Here it is, reproduced with no copyright, warts and all.

A cat is a lost cat (by Sara Hana)

My cat is really dangerous. My cat is lost.

I miss my cat.

My cat is under the table.

I found my cat.

The end.

And just to illustrate the story, there is a sketch of what looks like a cat under what looks like a table.

We have lift off! Kinda...

2009-02-09T10:37:00.004+08:00

For the longest time, I have been worried about Sara. She wasn't coping well at kindergarten and now struggling with primary school.

She's going through Kumon (which is helping her) and we've put her into a before-school care programme because they can assist her with schoolwork and provide tuition. Over the weekends, it's me or the husband coaching her. It sounds like a lot of work. It is a lot of work. Especially if you've just turned 6 years old. And everytime we need to go through schoolwork, there would be tantrums, tears and screams.

But this weekend, I think we had a breakthrough. We completed her homework (why is there SO MANY??), revised some lessons as well as complete her Kumon worksheets. After ALL of that, my littlest wrote a story about a missing cat (it's such a cute story that warrants a separate post). ALL of these were done WITHOUT the usual drama that usually entails.

The only thing that I did differently was that I asked her to list out the things she had to complete. And everytime she completed a task, she could scratch that task out with a red pen. She listed stuff out and we had seven on our list. As we started doing on Fri night, I told her we could space the work out until Sunday afternoon and that we would do things step-by-step.

She seemed to be happy with it and slowly, we went through the list. We completed one task on Friday night before my halaqa started. Then by Saturday afternoon, we completed five tasks. I asked her to take a nap and then we could play and do the rest by Sunday. She woke up from her nap - actually she woke me up from my nap, too - and said she wanted to complete everything on her list. I thought I was dreaming.

By Sunday, we had nothing left on the list but she wanted to do more. I was almost giddy with happiness by the 180 degrees turnaround. So we had a major breakthrough and I hope to God we can keep at it.

The breaking down of tasks has given her a perspective that the amount of work she needs to do IS finite and can be managed. And she is allowed to celebrate mini victories - a sum correctly answered equates to a kiss or a high-five from Danial or Farah or anyone else she fancies.

So at least, it seems she would be better prepared at school today. Although I don't think the before-school care arrangement is working out (more on that later). She was reluctant to let me go when I dropped her off and I wasn't terribly excited that the tutor at the care center is planning for a test for everyone. Anyways, the husband and I had a brief chat about that and we'd likely decide soon on what we need to do. All I know is that Sara's new found confidence will be dented if she flunked this test - and in all honesty, there is a higher chance she would because she is only now getting an understanding of what to make of number sentences and number bonds.

So, perservere we must. And as she said to me yesterday, she likes doing things when we do them step-by-step.

A treasure found

2009-01-29T14:42:00.006+08:00

A few weeks ago, when I was crazy busy with my projects, I brought the kids and the husband to my office over one weekend. I had to work and since I can't be with them at home, I figured they should be with me at the office.

It also means I had two extra pair of hands (husband's and helper's) to help with the photocopying of materials and basically sharing around the paper cuts that I would've gotten all by myself.

The kids, while the adults were at it, were given paper and pens and markers to keep themselves occupied. Farah supervised the two younger ones since she, at nearly 14, does not fancy colouring or drawing anymore.

Fast forward to the future, I was clearing stuff from my desk and chanced upon this drawing that Sara had made and left on my desk. I didn't realise that she had left it behind for me. She has been harping on about having more siblings (dream on, kid) and is apparently obsessed enough to draw out what her siblings would have looked like and have also given them names.

I'm pleased to introduce to you, my other children.

Of celebration and reflection

2009-01-28T10:42:00.002+08:00

I'm back now. The projects are now over, and I am re-focusing on business as usual activities. Which means, things are more mundane but no less hectic.

Woke up this morning to see the screaming headlines of big name companies laying off 90,000 jobs worldwide. Scary is an understatement.

As I open my email after a 2-day break for Chinese New Year, I saw a flurry of email about how we need to keep our head above water and seize the opportunity to do better than the competition. Now's the time to take share and grow revenue because the competition is too distracted by having to keep afloat. And then there was another flurry on increasing productivity. I'm thankful I have a job still that I enjoy doing that helps provide the nice extras to the family.

And so, I think everyone would need to pitch in and do their best to ensure they contribute to their company's success in this trying times. Befitting with the Year of the Ox, no? A stable and hardworking beast that keeps toiling the field to ensure its master is successful. Because, to be alive and working is better than to be dead and cooked in rendang.

Back to the grind, folks!

Blog break

2009-01-08T12:26:00.003+08:00

Pls excuse my absence. God willing, I will be back in two weeks.

Currently busy with work and on a personal front, while Sara is adjusting well to school and student care arrangements, her mummy is not just yet ready to let go.

And oh yes, pls go catch Seven Pounds. Will Smith is in it and I think he deserves an Oscar for his role in that movie. And just to show you I'm not being totally biased since I really, really, REALLY like Mr Smith, the husband agrees that Will Smith should get an Oscar for this. However, the husband also agrees that I drone on and on about the most talented actor in the whole wide world. Whatevs.

It's official

2009-01-02T16:14:00.004+08:00

Sara Hana is now officially a primary school student. No longer a kindergarten-er. Sigh.

She's in a student care center in the morning so that she can get help with her homework and do some group studying. Then she'll get lunch before she gets dressed (by herself!) to go to school before the helper comes to get her midday to take her to school. She's such a big girl now. Sigh.

Danial is now in primary 4 and Farah is now secondary 2, inching closer to the N and O level exams. Sigh.

My babies, all grown up now. Sigh.

What I've been up to...

2008-12-22T16:07:00.002+08:00

We drove up to Terengganu, attended a wedding, went to the waterfall and went stir crazy shopping at the local market that is filled with songket and batik. Because I plan ahead and the husband was paying, I bought clothes for next Eid for the girls and some other stuff for the home. The two boys can then match their outfit for next Eid based on what us three girls decide. What, you haven't heard of strength in numbers?

We were home after four days and work continued until last weekend when we hosted 24 (yes, that's right, twenty four) people at our house in Melaka. These are the folks who attend the halaqah we host weekly and their family members. It was chaotic and I was super worried that the guests won't be comfortable - they couldn't get rooms in hotels because there were too many Singaporeans who decided they would weekend in Melaka as well! It was fun but tiring.

The result of an overload of socialising is of course tiredness and body aches. I sure hope I don't collapse during the Christmas break because whilst I want to do absolute nothing and go nowhere, it doesn't mean I want to be confined to my bed feeling miserable and crabby.

Speaking of Christmas break, I have also booked some (halal) Christmassy food. The husband is an unrepentant carnivore so the sight of roast beef was too good to resist. I'll be making salad with cranberry and almond flakes with some mango vinagrette (anyone has a good recipe to offer?). The occasion? Just because it's time to chill out with the people who matter most.

How do you know

2008-12-17T23:06:00.003+08:00

My littlest one will turn six tomorrow. As with our family tradition, we will have a small cake and nice dinner at home and that's it. I'm surprising her with a pink cake with a picture of Barbie (I know! I relented because she told the husband she would like a Barbie cake and I just felt like I *had* to get her the cake she wants. Especially after she mentioned to the husband in a very mature and matter-of-fact the reason why we don't have big birthday parties).

So as we were just chatting, after reading a book on Ballerina, she asked me how I knew her birthday is the 18th of December every year. I told her I was there when it all happened.

Six years on, and she still cracks me up.

The big decision

2008-12-11T12:01:00.002+08:00

I went to see the MBA programme manager last night to talk to him before I sign on the dotted line and hand over the first cheque.

There were a couple of things he said that made me go "uh oh" and one of them was the fact that I had to fulfil at least 90% attendance of the classes before I would be allowed to finish the module and sit for the exam. I think 90% is demanding especially for people who have to travel for work. And I know my travel schedule from next month onwards would be a bit crazy considering the travel freeze would be lifted. I had too many meetings that I happily said no to because I couldn't travel and these are coming back to haunt me.

So, after some more thinking, I walked away without signing the application form. And I feel good about it. The attendance requirement didn't quite register the first few times I spoke to the programme manager but alhamdulillah, it has now and I know it's not something I can commit to.

Falalalala lala la la

2008-12-09T21:01:00.004+08:00

I've now just been able to come up for air. Work has been punishing and the kids have kept me really busy. Who knew that school holidays meant a break for teachers but extra work for parents? I'm only half kidding - the teachers I know are not having a break and parents have to work doubly hard at home to keep the kids entertained.

So anyways, if you didn't catch Muallaf, you missed out on something really good, my friends. I think The Picturehouse extended the screening of the movie which is a good sign that many more people have gone to watch it. The husband was very glad I dragged him along even though he really had no choice as he has to follow what I say since I'm his (hot) wife. His typical movie experience must include car chases and explosions or a shooting scene so for him to say he wouldn't mind watching Muallaf again, is saying a LOT. I'm waiting for the DVD to be out.

Jingle bells, jingle bells...

Moving on to a totally unrelated train of thought, I'm thisclose to signing up for an MBA programme. Yes, being overworked is restricting oxygen flow to my brain and that is impacting coherence of thought and clouding judgement. I don't even know what I'm doing blogging about this when I might chicken out at the last minute. I'm taking this up not because I want to be the next CEO to bring down a bank, coz there ain't many of those banks anymore to bring down to begin with. It's really for personal development firstly. And secondly because I am sadistic, that way.

Lest all my three readers think I am taking this lightly, pls know that I have been researching a suitable programme to join for a couple of years now, and have been making lots of du'a (that's supplication or prayer for those who are wondering what that word means). And the more du'a I make, the better I feel about signing up.

On the first day of Christmas, my true love sent to me.

Moving on to another topic, as you can tell, the Christmas muzak is wreaking havoc in my head. Everywhere I go, it's silver bells and someone dreaming of a white Christmas. Just like the ones I used to know. Know what I mean?

If you celebrate Christmas, happy shopping. If you don't, don't be shy about crowding the malls for shopping, too. The economy needs the contents of your wallet and there are many bargains to be had (unless of course you are in debt, and if you are, pls don't pay any attention to my shopping suggestion).

I think that's enough rambling for today. Bye.

Once adversaries, now friends

2008-12-02T12:44:00.003+08:00

OK, maybe not friends, but certainly team mates.

I'm refering to Hilary Clinton accepting the Secretary of State position in Obama's (upcoming) administration.

It takes a lot of maturity to put aside differences the two politicians once publicly had, and then be on the same team. I sure hope it's not just posturing but then again, politicians have big ambitions and they are known to be opportunistic in order to gain more power.

Anyhow, read this article and contemplate what the last paragrah says. Because when I came to that last paragraph, I had to nod my head. Mr Obama was unwittingly not only describing the White House, he is also describing an administration that you may be familiar with.

So much to say...

2008-12-01T11:17:00.004+08:00

but too little time at the moment.

Very quickly:

1. You must watch Muallaf. The screening ends this Wed. It'll move you to tears and it'll make you laugh with its simplicity and honesty. Quick, book your tickets now.

2. I cried when I read about the carnage in Mumbai and the Singaporean hostage that was killed. Two wrongs do not make a right. Don't the perpetrators fear the wrath of Allah for using his name to kill innocent folks who just happened to be there?

More soon, insha Allah.

A date

2008-11-28T07:00:00.002+08:00

I really can't wait for it. More than just hanging out alone with the husband, it's the chance to rediscover the beautiful. heartwarming and thought-provoking new movie by Yasmin Ahmad (edit: wow, I actually meant to say to rediscover the beautiful, heartwarming and thought-provoking style that is Yasmin Ahmad in the new movie...). I'm such a fan that I don't even need to watch the new movie to know it will be all that and more.

I have all of her movies on DVD and I watch them over and over again. My only regret is I am missing her Meet the Director and Cast session on Sunday but hey, this is better than nothing!

Grumpy at work

2008-11-25T15:24:00.004+08:00

All the talk across the border and the final fatwa that yoga is now haram is just too annoying for me. Granted, I am not Malaysian and so technically, I am not affected by the edict, I still can't help but feel sorry for those who practise yoga as a form of exercise and I am annoyed at those in power who think by doing a pose, you will lose your religion.

I have never had to chant anything during the class and I have never feel like I had to change my religion after each class. It's time like these that I am glad I live in Singapore.

And especially so after I hear our PM and our President will take a pay cut of close to 20%, with each of them now ending up with slightly more than S$3 million a year. Oh, that must hurt! I wonder what their belt tightening measures look like.

And of course our town councils losing $12 million in those toxic Lehman and Merrill Lynch investments. But you see, that represents only a miniscule percentage of money from the overall honey pot.

Let's see, with that negligible amount of money they could have used it to benefit residents who dutifully pay that amount on a montly basis by REDUCING our conservancy charges since clearly, $12 million is but a small fraction of the monies they have. And they could also try to help residents who are STRUGGLING to pay their conservancy charges.

Maybe, Mauritius is a good place to live in...hmmm.

And I am getting old...

2008-11-19T15:22:00.003+08:00

Besides the fact that I just had a birthday, I know for sure I am getting old when:

1. The radio station starts playing Jonas Brothers and Vanessa Hudgens and I become judgemental. Like c'mon, a respectable radio station should NOT be playing Disney Channel merchandise!

2. I get disgusted looking at teenagers getting touchy-feely and I feel like I should call and report this indecent behaviour to their parents.

3. I subconsciously wish for the teenage boys walking down the street to go get a haircut for goodness sake.

4. I start to wonder out loud when would the artist formerly known as Prince would cut a new album.

5. My kids ask me who Prince is.

6. I admire Madonna's stamina and great bod at the age of 50 (or maybe she is slightly older?).

7. In my mind, I trash-talk a colleague who is lamenting about "hitting the big 3-0".

8. I think low-rise jeans should be banned, I have had enough of being an involuntary witness to too many a butt-crack.

9. I take an increasing number of multivitamins and supplements.

10. I start worrying about the height of my heels.

Surreal

2008-11-17T17:12:00.002+08:00

All abit unreal, as well... but I do find this story (morbidly) funny.

LONDON (AFP) - - A British woman is to divorce her husband after discovering he was having a virtual affair within the online game "Second Life," British media reported Friday.

Amy Taylor, 28, met her husband David Pollard within the game in May 2003, and six months later, she moved into his home in Cornwall, southwest England.
The couple married in July 2005, while their "Second Life" avatars Dave Barmy and Laura Skye -- younger, slimmer versions of their real-life selves -- also held an online ceremony for their virtual friends.

After a rare break from the computer, however, Taylor returned to find her 40-year-old husband in an intimate, albeit virtual, position with an online prostitute within "Second Life", which she said was the "ultimate betrayal".

"I was so hurt," she was quoted as saying in The Times, adding that theirs was a "very serious marriage".

"I just couldn't believe what he'd done. It's cheating as far as I'm concerned, but he didn't see it as a problem and couldn't see why I was so upset.

"He said I was just making a big fuss and tried to make out it was my fault for not giving him enough attention."

Second Life is an online role-playing game with more than 15 million users, in which players can create virtual avatars and interact with other gamers, or the environment.

The game has its own virtual economy, in which online currency can be exchanged for real-world US dollars, and several major businesses have set up "branches" within the game, while others operate entirely within it.

According to the Daily Telegraph, Taylor claims that Pollard is now engaged to the woman he was having an online tryst with, despite never having met her.
She has, meanwhile, found a new love, through fantasy online role-playing game "World of Warcraft".

http://sg.news.yahoo.com/afp/20081114/ttc-lifestyle-britain-family-divorce-int-0de2eff.html

Sad goodbyes

2008-11-17T11:45:00.004+08:00

Last week was the last day for schools here. But what a milestone it marked for Sara. That was the last day of kindergarten for her. It didn't occur to her then, when she was getting dressed to go to school, that that was going to be the last day of her being a kindergartener and the last day of being classmates with kids whom she's been with since she was three.

When I got home on Friday, the helper was telling me that the kids were crying and hugging each other as they left the school premises. Apparently, the teachers were also teary eyed and there were some tears from the parents themselves as they picked up the kids from the school one last time. Sara told me she would miss her friends and teachers.

Life really does come full circle. I remember her first day of pre-nursery. There was anxiety and there were lots of tears, too. And now, fast forward to four years later, there were still anxiety and tears but of a different type.

I'm happy that my daughter could feel and understand the meaning of that day. To console her, I told her about the dance practice sessions that she will be going to, as she and her friends prepare for the year-end concert in December. And that she would still get to see them and her teachers and even then, it's not necessary to think of goodbyes as the end of the friendship as she will remember her happy days at the school for a long time more.

All I can say is, my baby girl is moving on to the next phase of her life. And she will learn to adapt to her environment, while remaining true to herself.